Page 31 of Blue Norther
Violet’s hand wrapped around my arm.
“I need to tell you something.” Her voice broke, fingers digging into my skin.
“Okay.” Fuck, she was scared. I helped her sit then took two steps back, crossing my arms and hoping like hell I could stay calm.
“It’s about the baby’s dad.” Her eyes dropped to the ground, and I felt the heat rising in my chest. Because I knew where this was going.
“Youdothink he’s the one stalking you, don’t you?”
She shook her head, still not looking me in the eyes. “It’s not him, Colt. He’s the most annoyingly protective person I’ve ever met.”
Fucking great. Now I’d be fucking pissed off about thisincredibly protectivebaby daddy that in fact seems like the world’s biggest douche-canoe for the rest of the night, because how thefuckis he so amazing if he left Vi and the baby all on their own this close to her goddamn due date?
“So why isn’t he here? Why isn’t he protecting you and the baby?”
“He is,” she whispered.
I sank down on the mattress next to her hip. She was fucking talking in riddles, but the way her eyes didn’t leave mine, the way it looked like she was willing me to understand what she wanted to tell me without saying the words, left me with a hope spreading through my chest like a wild fire. Her hand reached over, grabbed mine, and put it back over her belly.
I froze. “Are you saying…Are you telling me…”
“That you’re the baby’s father? Surprise…” A fat tear rolled down her face. “You’re going to be a dad.”
I jumped back, tripping over my own feet as her words slammed into me. I’d heard them before. Each time her voice sounded more tired, more afraid of what was to come. But this time…this time, the words were tinged with hope. Hope that I’d be happy? Hope that I’d be there for her? For him? Myson.
I fell to my knees and cupped her swollen belly.
“Say something. Please,” Violet begged.
“H-how?” I stuttered over the question.
But the truth smacked me right in the chest before I’d even gotten the question out. Tears burned in my eyes as I tried to swallow past the emotion sitting painfully in my throat. Deep in the divorce paperwork had been one single sheet of paper that I thought about every goddamn day for years. Our last chanceat becoming parents. One tiny embryo, not graded that well and not expected to lead to a pregnancy, that I signed over complete ownership of as a part of finalizing the end of our marriage.
It felt like the final nail in the coffin. But now, all I could think about was how fucking happy I was. It wasn’t the end.It was just the beginning.
Something in my chest cracked wide open. I pressed my hand against my heart, trying to catch the breath that had been knocked completely out of me. Beneath my other hand, my son rolled. His back pressed out hard against the pressure of my hand.
Fuck. I felt like my heart was going to give out. A pathetic groan left my body as I fell back on my ass.
“Colt?” Violet slid down, sitting on the floor with me. Her hand came up, pressing against mine. “Are you okay? You’ve gone really pale.”
“I…I…” I couldn’t get a clear thought out. “Jesus. I need to get my heart checked out.”
Vi squeezed my thigh. “Are you having chest pains? Should I call an ambulance? Or one of your brothers? Jessie?”
“No.Fuck.” I cleared my throat. “No, Vi. Just…Come here.”
I opened my arms, and she looked down at my chest for a moment before landing against me. My arms wrapped around her in an instant, just for a moment, before I remembered I desperately wanted to hold her belly, too.
“I’m going to be a dad.”
“Yeah…”
“We’re…the both of us…are having a baby.”
She nodded. “I mean, I am. You don’t have to be if you don’t want to. I made this decision on my own. It doesn’t have to change things for you. I know it probably does, but don’t feel bad if not.”
Her fingers brushed on my face, and it was only then that I realized I was crying again. Just like I had the day she came home.
