I wanted to blame one of them for being selfish, but I couldn’t. For one, I had no clue whose idea this was. I suspected it was Justin, but I didn’t know for certain. He seemed to be the one keeping the most distance between us. Or maybe Ben? What if he didn’t like the way things were going between me and Justin? Or hell, maybe it was Landon.
Shit. I had no clue.
I wasn’t sure what Ben felt for me, but I knew we were close. If nothing else, we were friends and I was content with that. As for Justin… He was an enigma. He kept his emotions guarded and I felt as though he merely wanted to use my body when it was convenient for him. Not that I minded. I was enjoying that part. Of course, that had me thinking about Ben again. Ben was Justin’s submissive. Did that mean that Ben took orders from Justin even when he was the dominant one? Was he only with me because Justin instructed him to be?
And Landon… I felt something deeper with him. I’d spent enough time with him to know that we had connected on an emotional level. Except he didn’t seem to be fighting for me.
Then I realized that I didn’t have all the tools necessary to make a decision. If these men wanted me to make a choice, it only seemed fair that they had to be held responsible for their actions, too. I certainly wasn’t going to make it easy on them. They had specifically stated that they couldn’t make contact with me, but if I initiated it…
Grabbing my phone, I pulled up Landon’s—yes, I was back to calling him Landon because right now he didn’t deserve to be called Sir—number. I would text him my instructions since he seemed to be the one trying to bring this to a close.
Luci: In order for me to make an informed decision, I need to make a request.
Landon: Anything, sweet girl. Just name it.
My heart once again did a slow flip in my chest at his pet name for me. I liked that he used it. In fact, I liked that they all had a different one for me.
Luci: I’d like for each of you to write me a letter. Doesn’t have to be lengthy, but I’d like you to write me a letter telling me what these past few months have meant to you. Once all four letters have been written, seal them in an envelope and give them to Jordan. I’ll arrange to get them from him.
Landon: I’ll let the others know and we’ll have them to Jordan first thing tomorrow morning.
Luci: Thank you.
Rather than go into a detailed explanation of why I felt this was necessary, I put my phone down. I didn’t want to chat with Landon and disobey the rules. However, I knew better than to email them at their work addresses because this was not technically company business. Although we had an arrangement, I wanted this to be separate.
•
I received a text message from Jordan at 5:40 p.m.
Jordan: Dale and I would be honored if you’d join us for dinner tonight. Would six thirty work for you? I’m not sure how long it’ll take you to get here.
He followed the first text with his address, which I learned—thanks to Google Maps—that he was about three blocks from the office. I texted him back to let him know six thirty would be great. Knowing I looked like a bum, I quickly changed into jeans and a nice sweater, pulled my hair back in a ponytail, and touched up my makeup before hopping in my car and heading back downtown.
It didn’t take long to locate Jordan’s apartment. When I knocked, I was instantly met by Dale, who gave me a huge grin as he pulled me inside.
“You made it,” he said in a huff. “I think my Knight’s going a little crazy worrying about you.”
I smiled, loving how he referred to Jordan as his Knight, even in such a casual environment.
“Well, he has no need to worry. I’m perfectly fine.”
Dale lifted one dark eyebrow. “Fine? Honey, you’re not fine until you’ve had a couple glasses of wine and you share all the deets of what’s going on. J won’t tell me anything and if I don’t get something soon, I’m going to lose my mind.”
I laughed. I liked that Dale was as eccentric as Jordan. I hadn’t expected it, honestly.
“Where is she?” Jordan yelled seconds before he appeared in the small entryway. “Get your little butt in here, woman.”
I let Dale lead me into the kitchen, where Jordan set a glass of wine on the breakfast bar and pulled out a stool for me.
“Sit. Drink. Dish.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. I was so glad I’d decided to come over. Truthfully, after what had happened earlier, I wasn’t sure I was going to be smiling, much less laughing for quite some time.
