Page 10 of Solivagant

Thalin flicked his braid over his shoulder and turned, sauntering off into the Weeping Woods as if I’d go chasing after him. He was entirely delusional, but it didn’t matter anymore.

What mattered was that I had even less time than I’d anticipated to secure Jem’s protection. I needed to speak to Aerith and have her prepare everything she needed for a soul binding. Then I needed to see the witch.

6

KHORLI

“I’m sorry,” Aerith told me, though her face showed no sign of genuine sympathy. Lilac eyes looked at me only with cold pity.

“For what?”

“For not realizing you knocked more than a couple of souls loose in your battle with Avaran. Had I known you’d been inflicted with madness, I’d have shown you the mercy of putting you out myself.”

I’d expected this reaction from her, and I honestly couldn’t blame her for it. I’d have responded the same before I’d come to truly know Jem. Before I knew what it was like to love him. His love had changed me, and I knew once this all worked out, Aerith would come to see that too. She’d be fond of him the way she was fond of me.

I stared at her, and she stared at me, both waiting for the other to give in.

The trickle of iridescent water from the holy fountain and the soft hoots from the golden elder birds perched around her temple filled the space between us.

A soft, sheer, lilac fabric traveled over each of her shoulders. Billowing over her ample chest, beneath her crossed arms, to join into a thicker strip at her belly that traveled down to the floor. It did nothing to cover any aspect of her body, but unlike humans, elves, and many others, Benygals didn’t wear clothing. Unless they were spiritual garments like Aerith’s were. We didn’t have a need. Fur coated us entirely in our beast forms, and we rarely consumed enough souls for our bodies to transform into what others might consider naked.

Aerith was an exception. She’d preyed on sun elves for many years and the fur coating her hoofed legs stopped just above her knees. She also had pointed ears like the elves. And unlike the Benygals native to the Weeping Woods, like me, she hadn’t consumed soul deer during her youth, so her antlers were very small. Instead, most of her flowers bloomed from a single horn that emerged from the top center of her forehead.

Aerith had only one scar on her body. It was on her back, and it was quite large. She’d never shared with me the story behind it, and I’d never asked. Asking a Benygal how they got their scars was a quick way to start a fight. Had she not been present when I acquired mine, I’d never have told her either.

She was a beautiful female. Had I any interest in those, and had she any interest in males, we may have been a suitable match. As it was, I knew she occasionally fooled around with Zyrli, though neither of us trusted her beyond the secret of the Bridge.

As for me, before Jem, I’d never had much interest in sex. Thalin had tried harder than any other to persuade me. While he was also beautiful, his personality was absolutely rotten. I had no interest in attempting to tame him. I’d leave that to Avaran, though I doubted he had the willpower to succeed.

It was only Jem for me. Knowing him like I did, loving him like I did, it made me think perhaps I’d been waiting for him all these centuries. So I definitely wasn’t about to lose him now.

“Aerith.”

“Khorli.”

“We don’t have time for this. As we speak, Thalin could be plotting to take him away from me.” I spoke with all the desperation I felt, instead of masking it as usual. The time for secrets was over. My vulnerabilities were already exposed, already at risk. Now I had to lay myself out openly in order to save everything I was so close to losing.

“Khorli. If you want to keep his soul for eternity, then go and eat it like a normal person.”

“I want more than his soul, Aerith. I want all of him. As he is. Intact.”

“What you’re asking isn’t possible. I cannot bind your soul to a human’s, even if it wasn’t complete madness to even consider it. It just isn’t possible. Human souls are pure, they cannot be altered.”

“Not by you,” I huffed, knowing it was probably a mistake to tell her even that much. “Get the binding ritual ready. I will return with Jem.”

I turned, ready to head to a place I swore I’d never return.

“Khorli.” Aerith’s pale fingers tangled in my hair as she yanked me back to her with surprising force. “Explain to me what you mean by that, because if it’s what I think you mean and you’re going where I think you’re going, then you’re even madder than I originally thought.”

“She’s the only one who can help me, Aerith.”

“She’s the reason I had to force deer souls into your eyes to prevent you becoming nothing but a beast again.”

“You think I don’t know that?” I turned, smacking her hand away. “I know that she’s mad. I know that she cannot be trusted. I have the scar to show for it.” I gestured to the jagged line that circled my neck. “Trust me, Aerith, I am aware. But she’s my only hope of keeping Jem.”

Aerith’s eyes softened for the first time since I’d told her my plans. “You really want him that much?”

“I do.”