Page 15 of The Highland Game

Maisie

Thanks, girls. I needed that boost. Because Jamie told me I look like a Smurf.

Cat

He did WHAT? Just when I think he’s hit rock bottom, he grabs a shovel and keeps on digging. Want me to kick him next time I’m home? Because I will. Happily.

Iona

Even by Jamie’s standards, that’s completely out of order. I’ll have a word with Lewis—he’ll sort Jamie out.

Maisie

No, honestly, it’s fine. I’m used to his nonsense by now. Just wanted to vent.

Cat

Fair enough, but I’ll kick him next time I see him anyway. Remember, you’re a queen and that hair is hot!

As I’m about to reply, another notification pops up. Speak of the devil . . .

LochNLoad

Feeling any better, Sass? Up for some questing? There’s a new dungeon that needs conquering, and I hear there’s a magical skean-dhu at the end of it. You in?

I decided yesterday that it’d be too weird to go on playing with LochNLoad, but attempting to tell Jamie my identity in person was a complete disaster. Talking with LochNLoad online, on the other hand? That’s something I’ve always found easy to do, so maybe that’d be a better way to approach this.

I reply in the affirmative, tell the girls I have to go, then grab my laptop and set it up on the kitchen table. When I log in, LochNLoad’s warrior avatar is already waiting near the portcullis of a crumbling stone keep that’s perched atop a misty cliff. My own character materialises by his side.

LochNLoad

There’s my favourite mage! Ready to face certain doom for the sake of treasure?

SassyLassie

Always. Though I have to say, your interest in acquiring a sock knife is . . . intriguing. First an enormous claymore, now this? What’s your strategy? Lure ladies in with the massive weapon, then when expectations are sky high, whip out the skean-dhu to make your own “dirk” look bigger by comparison?

Okay, okay, I’ll tell Jamie who I am in a moment, but after his comments to me earlier today, I reckon I’m entitled to tease him a little. It’s only fair.

LochNLoad

Wow! You SURE you’re feeling better? That was straight for the jugular—without so much as a hello!

SassyLassie

Hello. BTW, by “dirk” I meant your dick. I’m suggesting it’s small.

Actually, Iona once let slip that Lewis is rather blessed in that department—but that doesn’t mean his wee brother is too.

LochNLoad

Aye, I got that loud and clear, but cheers for hammering the point in nice and deep. I know you’re called SassyLassie for a reason, but this is next-level sassitude. And I’m already nursing a bruised ego today—managed to make an absolute tit of myself in front of a lass earlier.

I blink at the screen. Wait, is he talking about me? Before I can stop myself, I type:

SassyLassie

Oh? A pretty girl, was she?