Page 12 of A Pact for Porter

Porter was awake too, but neither of us spoke. We just held on to this moment. I was afraid that once I did speak, I’d beg him to stay. And for what? For me to finish a job? Maybe it would be different if I lived here, but I didn’t. No. His leaving was for the best, despite me hating it. I didn’t like it any more than my capybara did, but I understood it. He did not.

My project here was only beginning. I couldn’t abandon it. Not only was it my dream job and going to make a huge difference in my career, but this job was the reason I had my mate. Leave it? No, that wasn’t an option.

Eventually, our alarms were both going off. We could no longer hide in our little cove of love.

I helped Porter pack. Initially, the plan was not to hover or get in his way, but then I decided screw it. This was the only time I had left with him. I was using it to the fullest.

It wasn’t like he was going someplace where we wouldn’t have any contact. We could text each other every day. We could video chat often. Heck, we could send each other silly memes. It wasn’t going to be the same as him being by my side, but it would have to do.

My capybara wanted me to give over my skin so he could climb in the suitcase. And for a split second, I actually considered it.

We decided to say goodbye here instead of the airport\. In hindsight, giving up my rental car hadn’t been the best idea—or maybe it was. As hard as it was to say goodbye to him here, it was gonna be harder at the airport, and then I’d have to pull it together enough to drive all the way back.

Neither of us wanted him to go, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t happening.

We hugged each other for a long time, his suitcase by his side. I’d snuck out one of his shirts to keep so I could hold on to his scent. I didn’t tell him, not wanting him to worry about his mate who was so desperate that a dirty T-shirt was like gold.

His phone beeped, letting us know he needed to leave.

“We’ll figure things out.” He kissed my forehead.

I believed him. We would. But I wanted to figure it out now, and I wanted whatever it was to include my mate staying here with me.

I walked him out to the car. After one final kiss, I watched him climb in and drive off.

My apartment felt different without him. But, realistically, it wasn’t my apartment. It was a place I was staying for work. So, if he had he stayed, what then?

I threw myself into my work. It would be easy to neglect it, to hide under the covers and cry. I wished that, miraculously, everything would be perfect again, and he’d be back by my side.

This job was important. And if I had any hope of keeping myself from going into a solid funk, it was doing what I loved and some things I didn’t love, like figuring out the permits and the contractors. Creating the plans and organizing to put them into place were two very different things.

It took a lot longer to accomplish what I needed to for the day. My thoughts kept drifting back to Porter. Was he sitting next to somebody stinky on the plane? Were the planes on time? Did they get his luggage all the way home? If I could worry about it, it popped into my head.

“Hey.”

I looked over my shoulder to see Karma. I was back in the habitat room trying to find alternatives for one of the grasses because the only ones I could find available to buy for my project needed to be shipped from across the globe, and that added a lot of money quickly.

“How are things going?”

“Oh, I’ll show you.” And I went on and on and on about the project.

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t care about the project. I bet with your mate leaving…”

“I miss him so much. He probably hasn’t even touched down yet, and I need him back. He has a job and a house, and we’ll figure things out. We just haven’t yet.” It felt great having someone to talk to about this. Keeping it bottled up wasn’t helping me any.

“Porter’s your fated mate.”

“I know.”

“Then why are you sitting here being miserable instead of doing something about it?”

As if it were that easy.

“Look around this room.”

“But you’re working on a project, and not all of it has to be done onsite. You can go be with your mate. You’re not shackled here. We’re waiting on filing permits and all that anyway.”

The more I thought about what she said and the feasibility of it, the more I saw what a genius she was.