Page 545 of K.I.N.: Karma Is Near

And when Keith put me out, Amanda hadn’t hesitated.

She let me and Carter come right back.

No lecture before opening the door.

No making me beg.

But living there after everything came out was fucking miserable.

Not because they treated me badly.

Honestly, that would’ve almost been easier.

It was the awkwardness.

Everybody knew.

My mother knew I’d been sleeping with my sister’s husband.

Daddy knew.

The family knew.

Everybody now knew Carter wasn’t some baby with an absent father I didn’t want to talk about.

And then there was the baby in my stomach.

Also Xay’s.

There wasn’t anywhere in that house I could go to escape what I’d done.

Sometimes my mother would look at me and I could see the disappointment even when she didn’t say shit.

And what could I really say?

There was no explanation that made it better.

I fucked my sister’s husband.

Had his baby.

Got pregnant again.

Then tried to pass that second baby off as Keith’s.

That shit sounded disgusting even inside my own head.

Living with Amanda and Tim made me feel sixteen again, except I wasn’t some teenager who’d made a dumb mistake.

I was thirty years old.

I knew better.

So as soon as I had enough put away for the security deposit and moving costs, I found this place.

Close enough to everybody.

Far enough that I could breathe.