Page 26 of Ember Rising

Why should he look after you? You don’t deserve it. You’re nothing but a liar. Briar is better off with someone who hasn’t deceived her.

I sit down on my bed, my face crumpling as I break down in tears yet again. I had a restless night of switching between crying and trying to deep-breathe my way out of a nervous system on red alert.

This isn’t aromium. I wish like hell I could blame my emotional fragility on the compound, which heightens emotions. Unfortunately, this is all me.

I’ll run. If there are ILF people at the track, I can just jog around the courtyard. If nothing else, maybe I can exhaust myself to a point I can actually sleep a little.

I find the tennis shoes I got from the ILF’s massive warehouse full of new clothes, shoes, and coats. They’ve got everything anyone could ever need and more, and apparently it’s just one of many warehouses.

I’m lacing the second shoe when a knock on my door makes me jump. It was more of a pounding, which probably means it’s a man. I narrow my eyes, positive that whoever it is, he brought a massive amount of audacity with him.

When I open the door, though, it’s Briar standing across from me.

“Oh,” I say, surprised.

“Can I come in?”

I nod and step aside. From the knock and her tone, I can tell she’s angry.

My emotions are all over the place as I close the door behind her. I want to hug her. Tell her to leave. Cry. Laugh-cry. Rage.

“What the fuck is going on with you?” she demands, glaring at me.

I furrow my brow and scoff like I don’t know what she means. She throws her arms in the air.

“How am I supposed to leave with you like this? Marcus says to leave you alone, but I can’t. Is someone blackmailing you?”

I give her a puzzled look. “No. Why would you think that?”

“Amira!” Her eyes bulge and she makes fists at her sides. “Where did you tell me to go when you found me in the jungle after Virginia tried to kill me? When you went to get Marcus and Ellison and Nova?”

“Why are you asking me that?”

She crosses her arms. “Just answer me.”

A bitter laugh escapes me. “Are you wondering if I’m a clone?”

“Would it be so outrageous? If the thing that already happened once happened again?”

I roll my eyes. “For fuck’s sake. I told you to hide in a bush when I went for help. And after I brought the others and you found out about aromium, Marcus carried you back to our camp.”

Her expression relaxes. “So it’s you. And I don’t know if that makes me feel better or worse.”

“I can’t be in a bad mood?”

“A bad mood? Bullshit. I thought we trusted each other.”

“We do.” My voice breaks and I clear my throat, looking away.

“I have to go.” Her pleading tone cuts me like a knife. “My sister is being raped by the man who did the same thing to me. All I want is to run to her, cut off his dick and choke him with it. But I’ve had to be patient. It’s finally, finally time, and I can’t stop thinking about how worried about you I am.”

I’m a selfish liar. Unworthy of her.

“I want the same thing you do, Briar.” I fight my welling tears. “I thought I’d get to help you save Mae.”

She sighs softly. “I know. Marcus and I have been fighting Eli behind the scenes, trying to get them to reconsider. They’re adamant that they work in teams of two.”

A sick sensation washes through me. I’ve been holed up, feeling sorry for myself, and she’s been trying to help me.