Page 111 of Everdoll

Almost one year ago, after learning my father was at a bar in Lesse, I went to check on him. Seeing he was still alive made me glad. But his condition was dire. He had been taking high doses of drugs for a long time and was close to death. Raymond had said he would take care of it, that I wouldn’t have to go to those dangerous places anymore.

“Fine,” he replied briefly. “You don’t need to worry about him.”

I nodded again.

Accept everything like a lifeless doll.

“What about Mr. Loxton?”

I yawned and asked. His face had completely fallen now.

“Why are you asking about that bastard?”

“Remi! He’s your father!”

“He can go to hell, I don’t care.”

“He was nice to me, though… He said he’d find me another job if I don’t enjoy the agency.”

After I graduated from high school, I had joined the news agency where my father worked. The people there already knew me, and my father had been a highly respected and trusted employee before he went to The Buzz. In a way, I had gone there to fill his shoes, but I loved the job.

I loved writing. No one on Mars cared about such things anymore. But since the new robot law had banned everything produced by artificial intelligence, people had started writing books again, like in the ancient times. They had returned to being creative and different.

Well, writing brought peace to me. Just as I had felt when I was with Remi in the past, I felt the same way when I wrote. Safe, even if I was vulnerable, it didn’t matter; I didn’t need to build walls around myself. I could use a pseudonym and pour all the poison inside me into words.

Because I couldn’t pour it into Remi anymore. I shouldn’t.

“You won’t accept any job from him, Mina.”

He turned the lights off, only the faint light of Phobos spilled across the bed now, barely illuminating the room. As he moved toward me, I felt like I’d stepped into a fairytale. He pulled back the covers and settled in. When we finally lay face to face, I licked my lips, my gaze lingering on his features.

“You should stay away from that him.”

“Okay, okay…” The topic was a world away; I was lost in the shape of his nose. He brought our faces closer, gripping my jaw tight. Despite the darkness, I could catch the storm in his gaze.

“You don’t take me serious. Why?”

“How did you come to that conclusion?”

“Look me in the eyes and tell me you’ll stay away from Sebastian, Mina.”

“It’s not like I’m seeing him on purpose. I’m in his house, you know.”

“It’s my house.” He leaned over and pressed a kiss to my chin, making me let out a shaky, desperate breath. “When he dies, this place will be mine. Everything will be mine. You won’t have to feel like a stranger here anymore.”

I’ll always feel like a stranger in your world.

“My room isn’t so bad. Why don’t we go there?”

Seeing his pupils dilate, my heart filled with hope once more. Then he turned his head toward the ceiling, avoiding his gaze.

“We can… go there. But not now. I have things to do here.”

For some reason, I wanted to cry. I thought I had turned into a shell playing a role next to him, but no, my stupid sincere feelings kept coming out.

“You like being Loxton, don’t you?” I congratulated myself when I was able to continue speaking in the same cheerful voice.

He angled his head toward me, then opened his lips and closed them again, hesitating. I held my breath. I waited for the lump in my throat to pass, swallowing repeatedly. I wanted to ask one last time. Maybe just wanted to hear it.