Page 38 of Alaska Lights
I grind my teeth together first, gathering the strength to swallow the vulnerability. Turning my head, I stare into his deep eye sockets, nothing staring back at me.
“Because I don’t know how to live without it anymore. Because I don’t want to burden him with me. Because I don’t know how he could ever love me. Because how can we be together when neither of us—”
He presses a skeletal finger against my lips to shut me up. I’m tempted to bite it off.
“It doesn’t matter, Alaska. None of that matters. That’s all fear. You realize that, right? Fear has no place here. Not with Fate. You’re allowing years of fear to stop you from finally having a life you want. And we’re paranormals; it doesn’t matter that he is a man.”
“He is human. He’s never been with a man.”
“And?”
“I mean, it might bother him.” I’ve never felt like such a child before. My cheeks flush with embarrassment.
“Follow your instincts, Alaska. They are never wrong. Stop allowing fear to fight them. Fate doesn’t make mistakes.” He stands and downs the rest of his tea—leaving a mess on the floor as it splashes against his spine and ribcage.
“You only have six days, maybe less depending on how fast your body is breaking down. You need to mate him, or you’ll kill you both.”
“Is that why you’re here? To reap me?”
He nods. “I’ve had to warn all three of you ahead of time, and I kind of hang around in hopes I don’t have to. I think it’s special you’ve all found your mates. I’d love to have a mate one day. It’s hard to watch creatures second-guess such a wonderful thing.” He sets the mug down with a hard clink.
“I’m nervous,” I admit.
“You should talk to your best friend about it. He’ll know what to say. Please, don’t make me come back here. It’s too cold for my liking.”
“I’d love it if you didn’t come back,” I grumble, pointing to the door. “Don’t let it hit you on the way out.”
“Joke’s on you. I don’t need the door.” He snaps his fingers and vanishes in the blink of an eye, leaving nothing but his mess for me to clean up.
I release a breath when his magic lets me go. I slouch in the seat, rubbing my eyes again, then drag my hands down my face like Lorcan did. Leaning forward, I press my elbows against the worn wooden table I made about a hundred years ago.
It has another hundred years left in it, at least.
I drop my head in my hands, place two fingers on either side of my eyes, and rub my temples.
Fuck. That feels good.
Blood rolls down my cheek and drips from my jaw onto the table. That can’t be good.
The shuffling of feet coming down the hallway alerts me. I glance up to see a shirtless Soren scratching his stomach. How did Lorcan know he was going to come in here? That Void is weird.
He ain’t so bad for a piece of clothing.
The sleep clinging to Soren leaves the moment he sees the streaks of blood on my face.
He’s at my side in a blur. “What happened? Shit, are you okay? Let me get you a paper towel. Don’t move. I’ll be right back.” All I hear is the rip of a paper towel before he is at my side again, handing me the napkin.
“Thank you.” I wipe my eyes clean, sighing when the white paper towel turns red.
“You’re dying, aren’t you? I mean, yes, you have six months, but it’s going to happen sooner.” He inhales a deep breath to gather his emotions. “Isn’t it?”
I nod in agreement, freeing more blood from my eyes. “There’s a way to stop it.”
He sits down in Lorcan’s seat and sneers. “Why is my ass wet?”
I chuckle. “You missed a visitor. That’s not important.” I peek down the hallway again at the door I’ve been dying to open ever since Leo closed it.
I felt shut out and unwanted when he did that. I had hoped he’d leave it open. He probably needs time to process what he feels too. I can’t fault him for that.
