Page 168 of The Italian Obsession

Finally, it was agreed on. I would become your mother’s companion. I moved into the spare room of our family home. Your mother and I became just friends, and Angelina became my partner.

For many, many years, the three of us were happy with this arrangement. Your mother had my full support and devotion, and I got to live with my sons as they grew. Angelina had my full heart. But Angelina was missing a part of her life.

At the age of thirty-two and running out of time, she wanted a child.

I begin to hear my heartbeat in my ears as I read on.

I wanted to give Angelina a family of her own. She had given up her whole life and family to be with me.

To have half of me.

Angelina’s family disowned her when they found out she had moved to Italy to be a married man’s mistress.

When I wasn’t with her in Lake Como, she was completely alone.

It was a heavy burden to carry for her, and yet her devotion to me never wavered… not once.

She paid the ultimate price for my love: her dignity.

I loved her desperately, Enrico, please understand that this was not something that was created out of lust. I am a bigger man than that. I couldn’t fight my love for her.

I tried. For six years, I tried.

It only got worse with time, not better.

I agreed that she could have a child, and a year later, Angelina became pregnant. For the first time in my marriage, your mother was furious—crazy like I had never seen her before. She wanted to have my only children and she didn’t speak to me for three months. We fought. She showed me a side of her I hadn’t seen before. Heartbroken, I worked desperately hard to get my best friend back. I missed her. I missed your mother’s love, and then the unthinkable happened. For the first time ever, I fell in love with your mother. It was a different love to what I had with Angelina, but love nonetheless.

She deserved better than I gave her.

I don’t know how my life turned out the way it did. I was in love with two women.

My beloved wife and my devoted soul mate.

The three of us suffered, but Angelina ultimately sacrificed the most.

How could fate be so cruel?

The day Giuliano was born, my heart sang with happiness.

The joy that he brought to my Angelina was indescribable.

My biggest regret in all of this is that he didn’t get to grow up with his brothers. Enrico, when I look at him, I see you.

Brave, strong, and loyal.

I love you, Son… more than you could ever know.

I drop my head as the tears roll down my face.

I hate to admit it but I can relate to this story. It was almost my own.

I sit and stare at the bookcase in front of me as I try and prepare myself to read on.

You may ask why I didn’t tell you any of this, Enrico.

The answer is simple: it changes you. It changes every part of who you think you are. Knowing that your family’s money comes from crime, knowing that your father has committed adultery for all of your life… it’s soul-destroying.

Trust me, I know first-hand.