Page 55 of Benny

Any response he might have made was interrupted by the ringing of her cell phone.

She glanced at the screen. “It’s Abel.”

She answered and put the phone on speaker. “Abel,” she said warmly. “Any news?”

“Good morning, Jordan. Some good news, some no news. Your headquarters has been released. I already sent Beck a text, so your team should be able to get in there whenever you want and start cleanup. La Sombra’s organization has no further interest in you. They’re in such disarray after losing him and three of his top lieutenants being in custody that it’s pretty much infighting all the way down. They really don’t care about a cop who never made it all the way inside.”

“Well, damn. That’s good news on both fronts.” She paused. “What about IA? Any movement there, especially since they’ve released our HQ?”

“Not yet,” Abel said. “Word is, according to Ballistics, both of us fired a potentially fatal shot, but there’s no way of telling which one actually killed him. Right now, I think they’re just trying to figure out where to go from here. We both know I normally wouldn’t have access to any of this, but I have a few people who owe me favors, and they’ve been keeping me read in.”

Jordan thought about his words, and for a moment, she considered telling him what she’d been thinking about her future with the department but stopped herself.

She needed to talk to Benny first. Not because she needed his permission, but because she wanted his opinion. What Abel had just said about both of them firing a kill shot made the choice she’d been considering even easier.

“Well, if I’m cleared by the Gang Task Force, I guess I can go home.” She glanced around the penthouse. “Though I’m really going to miss this place. The views are amazing, and room service is awesome.”

“Enjoy the high life while you can,” Abel said. “You know we don’t make squat when it comes to salary.”

There was a smile in his voice. They'd both become cops because the job had called to them, but now Jordan was beginning to think her calling might be shifting.

They said their goodbyes and disconnected.

“You’re thinking really hard about something,” Benny said.

“I guess now’s as good a time as any to talk about this.” Jordan took a sip of her coffee. “I’m not going back to LVMPD. I want your thoughts, but I need to lay out why first, okay?”

At his wary nod, she continued. “You heard what Abel said. We both fired a fatal shot that killed a federal agent. It doesn’t matter that he was completely dirty. Killing a fed isn’t something that just magically disappears from anyone’s lives, and certainly not from departmental folklore. If IA decides there has to be some kind of administrative fallout, I’d rather it land on me than Abel. He’s had a distinguished career and can serve the department in a much greater capacity than I ever could.”

Benny opened his mouth, and she held up a hand. “Hold on a second.”

She knew exactly what was coming and loved him for wanting to defend her, but she needed him to hear all of it.

“I can move with more speed and agility than anyone else on the force,” she said solemnly. “I heal ridiculously fast. I don’t know if I could take a bullet or come back from near death like some of you have, but people are going to notice if I get into a dust-up with a suspect, he gives me a shiner, and the next day it’s gone. Sooner or later, I’ll slip and forget to tone down my speed in front of another officer or a suspect.”

She watched the wheels begin to turn in Benny’s brain and saw the moment he realized where she was going.

“I’m a much better asset to Dev and the St. Michael’s Solutions team now that my nanites are activated.” Her expression hardened. “What better weapon could we have when we go after Overlander? Plus, for all they know, I’m a dud. If I was wearing a badge, there’s a certain code I’d be beholden to adhere to. When we find her, I don’t want to be tethered by anything.”

Her voice had taken on a darker edge, and she didn’t care. “I’m going to make her pay for what she did to you. You get first crack at her, but I’m second in line.”

Benny’s mouth twitched. “Good to know.”

“Okay, I’ve said my piece. Where are the holes?”

He stayed quiet for a long moment before shaking his head. “I don’t see any. But Abel’s going to know you’re taking one for the team.” His expression turned thoughtful. “That’ll hit him hard. I can tell that much about him, even though I’ve never met him in person.”

Jordan nodded. “It will. But I’ll tell him the same thing I’m telling you. He’s a damn good undersheriff, and if Donovan decides to retire, Abel will make an outstanding sheriff. We need more men like him in positions of authority.” She shrugged. “I was good undercover, but that part of my career is over whether I like it or not. And now I have abilities I’d spend the rest of my career trying to hide. There’s no real reason for me to stay with LVMPD.”

Benny reached across the table, took her hand and squeezed. “Then, as long as you’re sure, we’ll start this new journey together.”

Everything inside her went warm at the words. Not you, but we.

“I’ll wait until I get a hint of what IA is thinking,” she said. “If they’re already looking at me for the administrative hit, fine. I won’t insult Abel by pretending I’m sacrificing myself for him. But if it looks like they’re going to hang this on him, I’ll step in. Either way, I’m resigning within the next few days.”

Saying it aloud brought an almost dizzying sense of relief. She was done. Not with serving or protecting people, just with the badge.

When Benny lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to her knuckles, Jordan realized she wasn't walking away from one life. She was choosing the next one.