Page 14 of Promised To A Menace

“I'm sorry, baby.”

My stomach dropped.

“Sorry for what?”

“I didn't tell you because...” He paused, and I watched his throat move as he swallowed. “I didn't know how.”

“Tell me what!”

“Before you were born, I was involved in some shit I shouldn't have been involved in. I wanted out, but getting out came with a price.”

I stared at him.

“What does that have to do with me?”

His eyes dropped. And suddenly, I didn't want him to answer.

“I made a deal.”

“So you chose to make a deal. What the fuck does that have to do with me?”

“You were the deal.”

Everything inside me went still.

“What?”

“I know I fucked up.” He stepped toward me, but I immediately backed away. “I know I did, baby, but at the time, it was the only way I could get out.”

“You...” I shook my head, trying to make what he'd just said make sense. “You made a deal involving me?”

“I didn't have any kids then. I didn't even know if I would ever have a daughter.”

“But you did.”

His face crumbled.

“You fucking did!”

“I know.”

My eyes burned, but I blinked hard, refusing to let the tears fall.

All these years. Twenty-five fucking years, this man had been my father. He'd raised me, protected me, spoiled me, showed up for me, and apparently spent every one of those years knowing this day was coming.

“You knew?” My voice came out quieter than I intended. “My whole life, you knew this was going to happen?”

“Shakaylen—”

“You knew?”

He slowly nodded.

A tear slipped down my cheek before I could stop it, and I angrily wiped it away.

“I prayed you would be a boy,” he admitted quietly. “The entire time your mother was pregnant, I prayed that you would be a boy because I knew what it meant if you weren't.”

I couldn't do anything but stare at him.