Page 25 of Everything After

“Y-Yeah,” she stammers.

“You’re doing well up here,” I say. “A few more weeks and we can fire Bella.”

“What?” Sierra gasps, spinning her chair to face me. Now nose to nose, I grin at her and her face flushes a pretty shade of pink. How did I miss this?

“I’m just playing with you,” I say. “We won’t fire her. But I might demote her.”

“Demote this, bitch,” Bella laughs, waving her middle finger around.

“Oh,” Sierra says softly.

“Mason and Bella are going to have dinner with us. You okay with that?” I ask, offering her my hand. When he gently takes my hand, I pull her up and hug her.

“Yeah,” she says, murmuring into my chest. I gently kiss her neck, and her entire body trembles for just a moment. I do it again, and the softest whimper spills out of her, prompting her to pull back and stare at me with wide eyes.

“Okay. We can get some pizza,” I say, not acknowledging that she is panicked by how turned on she is.

“Uh. Okay,” she says.

“You good?” I ask.

“Mhmm,” she says with a forced smile. She’s not. She’s triggered, but she’s trying to understand it.

“We will pick up pizza,” Bella says with a mischievous grin that I don’t trust.

“Okay,” I say. “Let’s go home, Kitten.”

Chapter Thirteen

Sierra

When we get home, I practically run inside. He had his hand on my thigh, unmoving, the whole ride home. That pressure is back, and I can’t escape it. When I get to the bedroom, I start stripping off my clothes in a panic. As I am about to pull on a large shirt, Beckett comes into the room. I am fully naked, and I freeze when he scans my body.

“Beautiful,” he says with a soft smile. When he stops in front of me, I start to drop my head, but he lifts my chin. “I’ve seen you naked before, Kitten. What’s on your mind?”

“I, uh…” I start to say, but he rests his other hand on my waist, and I nearly melt where I stand.

“Simplest way you can put it.”

“Bella said I'm turned on, and it scares me,” I say tearfully.

“The feeling scares you, or I scare you?” he asks gently.

“Both,” I admit.

“I will never hurt you, Sierra,” he says, taking my face between his hands. “Being turned on is just simple biology. I get turned on. Bella. Mason. Ace. Everyone.”

“I didn’t with Anthony,” I say. “I… It will hurt and… I don’t like how sex feels.”

“That wasn’t sex, Kitten,” he tells me. “That was rape.”

“But…”

“No,” he says. “Everyone’s body reacts differently to rape, but it’s automatic. Sometimes people’s bodies feel a fake version of pleasure, but they still don’t want it. Sometimes it hurts. Sometimes your brain shuts you down, and you feel nothing.”

“How would it be if I do want it?” I ask. “How can I tell real from fake?”

“Does the feeling hurt?” he asks.