Page 94 of Ruthless Protector

My heart was full of love for this man, so much I didn’t know how I could contain it.

I also knew I couldn’t stay, for so many reasons.

Yes, Trent was the main one, but there was also Tilly.

Tilly had lost her mom, she didn’t have a father worth a shit. He’d terrorized her, had hurt her over and over again. I didn’t think she could handle anymore loss. If Jude and I had given this a shot, and it didn’t work out, if it fell apart, it would be just another loss for Tilly, one I didn’t think she would bounce back from, after everything she’d been through. I promised I’d take care of her. If I put myself first, if I risked Tilly’s heart for my own happiness, I’d be no better than Trent—and I’d be letting Rebecca down, all over again.

I loved my niece too much to do that to her.

Getting her away, away from her father, away from the risk of more pain, was the only way forward for us.

It was the hardest thing I’d ever had to do, but I loosened my hold on Jude and let him go. He slipped from my body and stepped back, tucking himself back in, while he stared down at me with those soulful, gentle, gorgeous brown eyes. My nose started stinging, the backs of my eyes prickling.

He reached for me again automatically. “Willa…”

I shook my head, and moved away from him.

My heart was being torn from my chest and judging by the way he was looking at me, the pain was written all over my face. If he touched me, if I let him hold me again, I didn’t know if I could do this—and I had to do this.

I looked up at Jude. “Fay has a friend in Ohio, she owns a coffee house, has a small place behind it. She said it’s ours if we want it, that she can give me work.”

Jude’s big body was frozen in front of me, the expression on his face cutting me to the bone.

“I…I want us to stay friends. I know Tilly would want to stay in contact…if that’s okay with you?”

“You’re really leaving?” he said.

I nodded.

A muscle in his jaw jumped. “And you want us to be…friends?”

I swallowed compulsively, the stinging behind my eyes increasing. “Yes…friends.”

“You just came for me. Christ, I can still feel the heat of you wrapped around my cock, and you want us to be friends?” He shook his head. “You’re just going to walk away, from me, from us, and not look back?”

“It’s the way it has to be,” I said, hugging myself.

“Were you even going to tell me?” he asked.

I couldn’t meet his eyes. I’d planned to leave him a note.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Willa, I love you,” he said, taking a step toward me. One of his hands went to my waist and his fingers curled in, hanging onto me like he was afraid I was leaving that very second. “And you love me, too, I know you do. You don’t need to do this.”

He loved me? He loved me, too.

I kept my arms at my sides, even though my fingers itched to grab onto him, to feel his beard against my palms, his solid chest against my cheek, his arms tight around me again.

“We need to start fresh. Tilly needs a fresh start. New York, it’s…it’s not a good place for us.”

His fingers dug deeper. “I’ll take care of you, we can make a go of things, Willa. You and me, and Tilly…”

Oh God. “Jude…no.” I shook my head. “You and me. It won’t work…”

“Bullshit.”

“Jude…”

“You think we can just be friends? That I could let you just walk away? You love me,” he said again, breath huffing through his nose, his massive chest rising and falling, strain lining his face. “We love each other.”