Page 18 of Gaze

I slowly started to drift in and out of consciousness, but it was impossible to say I was sleeping. Time had no meaning or method of measurement without the hum of electricity. I allowed myself to drift in the nothingness.

I don't know when I finally managed to slip off to sleep, but I awake with a start. The cold metallic sound of my apartment door closing rang across the small space. I strained my ears to hear, hoping they would work extra hard in the darkness, but only silence greeted me.

Maybe it was nothing, maybe it was a car door or someone down the hall.

Then I heard it again, another noise. Closer this time. I couldn’t make out anything in the dark, everything beyond the end of my nose was a black abyss of nothingness.

“Who’s there?” I call out into the vacuum, but no one responds, maybe I am going mad. The heat is oppressive against my body; I can feel the sweat over me like a fine mist. I strain my ears trying to prove that there really is no one in my apartment.

Then I hear them. Hear them breathing. Slow and deep. For the first time in weeks, I feel cold, ice cold run all over me at the thought of someone in my apartment.

“What do you want?” I try to sound confident, like I could do something about their presence if I wanted to. “Lisa is that you?” I absentmindedly shout into nothingness.

A laugh.

A woman's laugh. Slow and husky. Sexy even.

My body reacts, a flash of heat crosses my cunt and up my spine.

“Thanks for the show” She purred

“Who…” I racked my brain for who this was, who was in my home. Who had used the cover of the blackout to violate me in such a way.

“Leave the door open again little slut, and I will show you exactly what pleasure can be.” A breathiness to her voice that laces the words in such promise I couldn’t focus on anything else. Before I could respond I heard the door clip shut and silence once again consumed my apartment.

chapter

nineteen

I didn’t sleep much that night, the power didn’t come back. Nor did my visitor. I lay in bed tossing and turning wondering who had come to visit me in the night. Who knew my door would be open, and most of all who had seen me.

Narrowing it down there were three people it could have been. Lisa, although it sounded nothing like her and I am not sure why she would have acted so out of character. Sure, we had played games in the bedroom but nothing like that. Bite was another option; she had my address after all. Lastly, the dark-haired woman from the window opposite, it wouldn’t have taken much for her to work out which door was mine from the windows.

I lay awake for hours in the nothingness, half awake and half asleep, my mind replaying the night over and over again. Sometime in the early hours the power came back on, I could see the red flashing digits of my alarm clock illuminate the room. I had never noticed how loud electricity could be, the dull high-pitched humming echoed around my head.

I watch as the light slowly creeps across the walls, the curtains doing little to keep the dim grey light out of my room. By the time it was fully lit I was up and groggily stumbling to my desk, grabbing a cigarette as I go. And I was still no closer to working out who was in my prison last night.

Starting up the computer, the metallic mechanical sounds filled the room as it slowly connected to the internet it wined and groaned to life. I wasn’t expecting anyone to be online this early in the day, but I could check my emails at least.

The obnoxious female voice informed me that I ‘got mail’ in her chirpy tone. I flick my eyes over the list of names and subject lines until I see one I don't recognize:

Sender: Unknown

Subject: None

Thanks for the show

B x

She was watching. She saw me. Saw what I did to myself, what I did for her. My pussy throbbed in response. I liked it. I like the idea of her watching me, seeing what I was doing to myself.

Was it her in my apartment last night? she knew my address; she knew where I would be. I had no way of knowing. As I moved away from the computer to the window I ruminated on the idea. Lighting a cigarette, I was quickly coming to the conclusion that I liked the element of not knowing as much as I liked being watched.

It is rare for me to be awake at this time of day, to see the world before it is fully awake. Chain smoking over the next hour or so was an easy habit as I watched the people around me start to wake up and get ready for their day. A glimpse of new habits and new routines that I had not seen before. People getting ready for their office jobs, children eating cereal and getting ready for school, each window I looked in I lit another cigarette.

Move on to the next window, light, drag, watch.

Light. Smoke. Watch.