Page 88 of The Lost Elemental

He whirled in my direction. “What do you mean?”

“Nothing. I just don’t think he likes me very much. Like father, like son,” I muttered.

Riven’s eyes narrowed on me. “It’s more than that. Tell me.”

“Why?” I pushed.

He let out a growl of frustration. “So I know how big of a mess we’re in.”

Something about the use of the word we had me softening. I glanced around and kept my voice low. “He cornered me outside the headmaster’s office. He’s never been kind to me, but this time he was so angry.”

“What about?”

“He saw the scars on my arm. He wanted to know how I got them. Where. How old I was.”

Panic filled Riven’s expression. He grabbed my hand and tugged me deeper into the stacks. “You didn’t tell him anything, did you?”

“Just that I got them in a fire when I was young. Why does it matter?”

A muscle along his jaw ticked wildly. “You don’t know my father. He uses any information to his advantage.”

I was quiet for a moment. “I can’t imagine growing up with him as a parent.”

Riven let out a long breath, sagging against a bookshelf. “It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.”

“I’m sorry you went through that. I’m sorry he hurt you.”

“I don’t need your pity,” he snapped.

I didn’t let his words hurt me, because I knew now that Riven attacked to keep people at arm’s length. To keep them from seeing all the things he hid from the world. But it wasn’t going to work with me anymore. I saw Riven. He wasn’t dark or light, he was an endless array of gray. In every tone and shade.

“What?” he barked.

“It’s not going to work.”

“What isn’t?”

“This prickly cactus thing you’ve got going on.” I gestured to him as I spoke. “I know that for Kai, Phoenix, and Atlas to love you, there has to be good in there. And they do love you.”

He scowled at me. “I’m not good. I’m the most selfish person on the planet.”

My eyes flared at that. Riven was used to getting his way. Spoiled in so many ways. Pompous for sure. But there was goodness in him. I saw it in the comfort he’d given Phoenix after his meltdown with his brother in fire class. I saw it in how he worried for his friends. That wasn’t the actions of someone who was selfish above all else.

“I’m not so sure that’s true.”

Riven sent a withering look my way. “You don’t know me.”

“Okay, then tell me something about you. One thing that you don’t usually tell the rest of the world.”

He stared at me, not blinking. It felt as if he were unraveling all the layers of my soul with that one look. And then he spoke. “I don’t think I’ve ever taken a full breath.”

My brow furrowed but I remained silent, hoping he would keep talking.

“Do you know what that’s like for someone with the gift of air? It’s a special kind of torture. But I don’t have the luxury of a full breath. I have to keep moving, always looking over my shoulder, never letting my guard down, forever thinking ten steps ahead.”

“That has to be exhausting,” I said softly.

“You have no idea.”