Page 89 of The Lost Elemental

I wanted Riven to take that full breath now. In this little respite we’d created from the world. But I knew he’d trained himself not to. “I never stopped running either.”

His gaze lifted to my face, holding me captive. “What were you running from?”

“Memories. Nightmares. To just try and keep my head above water.”

“Your life in the human realm, was it that bad?”

There was a gentle curiosity in Riven’s words. The first question that he’d really ever asked me other than something along the lines of what were you thinking? For the first time with him, I lowered my guard. I let him see all the emotions as they bubbled to the surface.

“My life was wonderful in so many ways. I have the best little brother you could ever imagine. My mom is hilarious and kind and caring. My best friend is a nut but always has my back. We struggled to get the things we needed, but we never ever lacked love. And those struggles just make you appreciate what’s important that much more.”

Riven moved in closer, staring into my eyes. “What’s the most important?”

“Each other. Nothing else matters if you have the people you love.”

Pain ripped across his face. An agony so intense I could feel it with every piece of my soul. “Aura…” His hand cupped my cheek, fingers trailing to my neck.

A hum lit deep in my muscles and my heart hammered against my ribs.

Riven leaned his forehead against mine, inhaling deeply. “You smell like mountain air and cinnamon. The best damn thing I’ve ever scented.”

My breath caught in my throat, unable to move.

Riven closed the distance between us, his lips meeting mine in a kiss. Gentle at first but then catching flame. His fingers tangled in my hair, tilting my head back and simply taking. There was no smooth artistry, only desperate need.

A door at the front of the library slammed, and Riven jerked away from me.

I couldn’t move at all. Everything within me vibrated. As if my whole body were on pins and needles. “Riv—”

“This isn’t happening.”

His words cracked like a whip, slicing into my skin.

I bit the inside of my cheek. “I’m not the one that kissed you.”

Riven’s eyes flashed with that now familiar blue heat. “You were looking up at me with that damn, life is beautiful sob story bullshit, practically begging me to kiss you.”

I reeled back. It hurt worse than anything else he’d ever said. Because I’d let him see into those places I didn’t share with others. “I don’t beg.”

Riven scoffed, that mask slipping back into place so easily. “That’s good, because hell will freeze over before something ever happens between us.”

He turned and stalked away without a backwards glance.

And I just let him go, cursing myself for giving him the power to wreck me.

46

I sat cross-legged on the grass, the cool night air swirling around me. It smelled of the pine trees surrounding me and a hint of something that was only of the elemental realm. Everything was quiet. The only sounds were the forest animals and the breeze rustling the branches.

It should’ve been relaxing. Peaceful. Instead, all I could hear were Riven’s words in my head. How little he thought of me. How I’d given him a piece of me, my history, and he’d spat on it and thrown it back.

A hand squeezed my knee. I looked up into inky-black eyes.

“I don’t think there’s a lot of centering yourself going on,” Phoenix said, the corner of his mouth kicking up. But underneath that lay worry.

“Sorry,” I muttered. “I’m not sure my head is in the Zen-centering stuff.”

Phoenix’s thumb swept back and forth across my thigh. “We can leave this for another night.”