Page 84 of Scoring Chance

“Elise!” I loved working with her. Warm, friendly, always brought in the best home-baked treats. She had a vast array of plants on her desk, and their branches would fall over my cubicle wall, making me feel like I was in a walled garden. Elise was one of many people who asked for my resume and would keep their ear to the ground for me. And she actually came through. “Elise is great. She makes the best chocolate chip cookies.”

“I know! Because of her, I gain ten pounds every Christmas. Anyway, MedTech is a medical device supply company, and I have an opening for a senior project manager on my team. You’d be liaising with our suppliers and keeping the trains on time as it were. I can send you more about the company and the role.”

“That sounds great. I’m very organized and meticulous…” I go into robot mode reciting my best qualities and experience highlights. I can feel my soul leave my body.

“Excellent,” Ellen says. “I need to hire for this role fast as we have a lot coming down the pike. Usually we do a screener interview first, but Elise’s word is good enough for me. I’d love to bring you in for an interview as soon as possible.”

“That’s…wonderful,” I manage, but my heart’s not in it.

I look toward the house. Through the window, I see Des on all fours being ridden by Lulu while Dean lifts a foam sword and chases them.

If I get this job…we won’t need to be married anymore. He’ll go back to his bachelor life. His sleek apartment. His late nights. His hookups.

He won’t be tied down by me. We can go back to how things used to be. We don’t have to worry about blurred lines, crossed boundaries, and scary questions about what this all means.

I wouldn’t have to worry about whether Des loves me or not.

I clear my throat. “Does Thursday work?”

24

DES

Agood night out for me was going to a hot new restaurant followed by a nightcap at a swanky martini bar. It didn’t involve cotton candy or Tilt-a-whirls. But that is where life has brought me tonight, to the Sourwood Elementary Halloween Carnival.

And I’m low-key excited.

The smell of funnel cake and sounds of gleeful screams deliver a nostalgic punch. The lights and sugar high are even strong enough to shake Davy from his funk for the night.

The Ferris wheel creaks overhead, the bright bulbs spinning in slow, hypnotic circles. The smell of kettle corn and fried dough fills the air, mingling with the distant sound of kids shrieking on the spinning teacups. I shove my hands into the pockets of my jeans, trailing a few steps behind Tanner and the kids as they weave through the crowd.

I spot Griffin and Jack at a game throwing baseballs to knock over wooden pins. Garish, large stuffed animals hover above, tantalizing Griffin’s two young daughters.

“You call that pitching?” June, Griffin’s highly opinionated seven-year-old, yells at the two large men. “Put some oomph into it. There’s an Olaf stuffed animal on the line.”

“This is harder than it looks,” Jack says, breaking a sweat.

“So is long division, but you don’t see me complaining.” June crosses her arms. She’s got a lot of spirit. I’m secretly scared of her.

Griffin briefly makes eye contact with me. His eye flits between me and Tanner, which elicits an eyebrow raise from him. Are you shitting or getting off the pot? His expression asks me.

“Dad! Focus!” June yells.

I turn back to the kids.

I shell out what feels like a month’s salary on ride tickets and refreshments for everyone. The kids gobble down enough fried Oreos and cotton candy to make their dentist a very rich man.

Tanner hands Davy and Dean a handful of tickets before they run off to join their friends. The boys hold out their hands like hungry goblins. Lena decided to skip the festivities to hang with Matthias and her friends. I asked her to elaborate on what “hang with” meant. She said they were all studying for a test. Before I could call bullshit, Tanner approved. He told me he trusts her. I should do the same. She’s a good kid. But the image of the vaping pen sticks out.

Lulu is talking a mile a minute, giving us a rundown of her itinerary as she holds each of our hands. “First, I want to ride the carousel. Then the bumper cars. And the train ride. Can one of you win me a bear?”

“Let’s take it one thing at a time,” Tanner says, with a crinkle in his cheek.

“This is nicer than any school carnival I went to,” I say, surprised at how big the whole thing is.

“Russ runs a tight ship. I’ll give him that.”

Lulu slips from our grip and runs to a flying airplane kiddie ride. So much for her itinerary. My hands graze against Tanner, who pushes them back in his pockets.