Page 87 of Love Out Loud

Chapter 31

Lark

When I left the hospital last night, the doctors were pretty sure they could discharge Devin today, so Richard and I are up early to get there as soon as visitor hours start. Rachel opts to stay home with RJ, so Richard drives me there. I slept most of the way to his house from the hospital last night, so it’s really the first time we’ve been alone for any significant amount of time since the divorce. It’s awkward for a million reasons. I can’t stop thinking about Lennon, for one, and Richard clearly doesn’t know what to say to me. Which is super great, because the drive from his house to the hospital is thirty minutes on a good day, and we run into traffic about ten minutes in.

“So,” he starts slowly, “Devin said you’ve been in Los Angeles this summer?”

“Yeah. I’ve been recording an audiobook with Lennon.”

He nods, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. “Nice.” After a long pause, he adds, “You had fun?”

“We don’t have to do this,” I quickly reassure him as kindly as I can. “You don’t have to pretend to be interested in the shit I’ve been doing. It’s really okay.”

Frowning, he glances at me before returning his attention to the road. “I’m not pretending. It sounded really cool.”

I lean my head against the headrest, looking out at the scenery slowly passing by his car. “It was.”

We’re silent for a while longer. Richard’s phone buzzes in the center console. At a stoplight, he takes it out to look at it, taps it a few times, then returns it. He smirks to himself briefly, but it’s gone as soon as it came on. Just when I think we’re going to settle back into silence, he takes a loud, quick breath in. “Kind of incredible you and Lennon have remained friends for so long.”

My eyebrows pinch together in thought, but I don’t take my eyes off the landscape. “What do you mean?”

“He was in love with you in high school,” Richard says matter-of-factly. “I always kind of thought you’d get together after we split.”

I eye him sidelong before shrugging and slumping farther down in my seat. I’m not in the mood to have a conversation with my ex-husband about my best friend and our complicated reality. They don’t even like each other.

“Yeah, well…” I trail off. “You can’t be right about everything, I guess.”

“Hmm,” he hums, unconvinced. “Okay.”

The way he says it grinds my gears. He doesn’t buy it, but he also doesn’t want some kind of confrontation about it. Which is fine, because I’m lying, but I also don’t need to sit in a car with him for the next twenty minutes while he’s all smug about it. I’m already miserable enough.

“I know you don’t believe it, Lark,” he says after a while, “but I do want you to be happy.”

“I am happy,” I retort without thinking. Another lie.

“Really? You don’t seem very happy.”

“It’s been a long couple of days,” I counter. Not a total lie.

He nods thoughtfully. “I was jealous of Lennon back then. You two have always had something special. If he makes you happy, you should run with it.”

Dammit. Am I always this easy to read? I slowly face him with my mouth agape as we finally pull into the hospital parking lot. “Thanks, Richard,” I finally manage. “That’s…really decent of you.”

He smiles at me, and then he’s out of the car while I’m still sitting there, dumbstruck and very confused about where that conversation came from and what to make of it.

By the time we’re in Devin’s room again, I’ve shaken off most of the weirdness. The three of us chat for a few minutes before Richard goes off in search of some coffee. The nurse comes in to check the machines Devin is still hooked up to and then leaves with assurances that the doctor will be by shortly and that she should be able to leave the hospital later today. It’s great news, but it also means I need to figure out what I’m going to do quickly. Noah will be needing those pickups soon, and I have to find a place to stay that isn’t my ex-husband’s couch.

On the way out of the room, the nurse stops. “Good morning, sir. Can I help you?”

A muffled voice comes from a little farther down the hall, but I could swear he says he’s looking for room 405. Love really does turn mortals into fools, because I want so desperately to believe that it’s Lennon out there, asking to be let in. That, somehow, he found me. That he can forgive me for leaving in the middle of the night.

But Devin goes still at about the same time I do, and we both look at each other. She must have heard it, too. Her face lights up, and mine might look like a deer in headlights because she cackles.

“I’m sorry, sir, but only family is allowed in at this time. You’ll have to come back later,” the nurse is saying, and I’m on my feet in a heartbeat.

But then I hear Richard’s voice, clear as day. “He’s family.” My heart soars, just as he says, “Come on in, Johnny. She’s just inside.”

I cringe. Devin woefully shakes her head.