Page 54 of Road Refugees

Recognition seeped into my brain. “Is that the name of the fucking puppy mill? Yes, I recall you. You said you’re the owner, yet you do nothing to stop them.”

“That may be true. But word on the street is that you guys are coming to wreak havoc upon my property.”

I jutted my jaw. “I’m not spilling a word, Bard. And I can’t bribe you with a twenty over the phone.”

“I’ll just come out and say it. I’ve got the Cinderella Complex. I’m psychologically unable to remove myself from the dominion of the Friends of Distinction. To redeem myself, my mission is to tell you I’ve appropriated a complete litter of newborn boxer dogs. I want to hand them over to you.” He added thoughtfully, “You are my prince. You’ve come to save them, and therefore me.”

Of course, I was highly cynical about all this, especially his psychological evaluation. “How do I know the Friends didn’t set you up for this?”

“Why would they? What’s a harmless old man like me to do with any of that illegal activity? I wouldn’t know anything about it. I want you to meet me behind the Target outside of Pure and Easy this afternoon at two sharp so I can hand over the puppies.”

I snorted. “Why does it have to be behind the Target? So the video cameras won’t see us?”

Bard became even more evasive. “Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.”

“So you’re not denying it.”

“Oh, don’t mind me. It’s part of the Cinderella Complex. Dependency on these guys has made me anxious. I fear that becoming independent from them will lead to my downfall.”

I had to shake my head to erase some of the odd things he was saying. “OK, behind the Target. At two.”

“And don’t bring your phone.”

I chuckled. “How did I know you’d say that? Is there a reason you don’t want anyone tracking where I’m going?”

Bard practically whispered. “You’ll see when you see me. If these Friends catch me giving away these puppies, why, they’ll have my hide.”

“More like stick you into that septic tank along with that other guy.”

“He’s in there, I tell you. I cannot tell a lie.”

“All right. Behind Target at two.”

“No phone.”

“No phone. But if I see anything remotely shady, I’m raising the alarm to the Bare Bones.”

“Fair enough.”

I thought. I was pretty sure there were security cameras behind Target too. But Bard was right—it would look ultra-shady to be handing over a whole box of puppies in a parking lot. I would have to borrow Heaven’s cage. If I put a box of squirming puppies in my sidecar, I’d lose the whole lot of them by the time I got home.

Of course, she asked me why I needed her cage. “I’m picking up a surprise for you.” I figured I could give the pups to Tanner for his rescue ranch. He could find homes for boxer puppies. Heaven gave me that fake-skeptical look, like “hmmm,” and pulled her car keys out of her bra. At the last possible second I asked,

“Hey. Can you do me a favor and watch my phone for me? Hey, put it where the car keys were.”

“Why?”

Testing out my authoritative prospecting skills, I said, “Just do it.”

And, like a good old lady, she did.

I kissed her deeply before I left. I was no moron. I knew there was more to Darcy Bard’s “offer” than met the eye. And, having been the victim of an assassination attempt before, I was especially leery. But all I had to do was take Heaven’s cage behind the store. If I saw anyone other than Bard, I could rabbit. No one was going to shoot me behind a well-known store. They already knew the Bare Bones was setting up a strike on their op. Why hasten its arrival by assassinating a prospect? And I was intrigued by the further intel I could gain from Bard. Still, I was leery enough to bring my 9mm Glock 17 with me, stuffed into my back waistband and covered by a jean vest. I did not qualify yet for a leather cut.

I didn’t see Slappy, Tobiah, or Crybaby. If I had, I might have told them where I was going. I was leaving it all up to fate.

I drove past many A-frame houses like Sax and Bee’s woodsy home. It brought to mind my first meeting with my love. Had I fucking saved her from the clutches of these whacked Friends of Distinction? A Boner had shot “Stomach” Ginsburg, and I had no idea whether he had survived. Either way, it was even more incentive for the Friends to go to the wall for their brother. I was starting to regret not having even secreted my phone somewhere in Heaven’s cage.

I rolled cautiously behind the department store building, toward a cage that looked like something Bard would drive, a beaten-up Honda or other. He must’ve driven in the truck loading dock side, because yellow safety bollards prevented me from going further. That was fortunate. I idled Heaven’s car and flashed my lights.

That feeble, hunched Darcy Bard emerged from the Honda. He waved, like we were meeting for coffee. I looked to all sides. No other cars, not even a delivery truck.

When Bard opened the back seat door and removed a box of something squirming, I got my hopes up. Maybe we have an inside man. I got out and slammed my door, raising my hand in something of a military salute.

“Bard,” I shouted, and took several steps toward him.