Page 37 of How We Began

“Were you expecting someone?” she asked arching a brow

She’s picked up this annoying habit from my brother. “Nope. Just your beautiful face.”

“This is for you,” she said, and slid a box towards me, which I opened to find a blue topaz pendant blinking at me.

It’s beautiful, but the colour of the stone is a little too close to my favourite shade of blue.

I was unable to thank her due to huge lump that formed in my throat. So I just squeezed her hand instead, and put the necklace around my neck.

24th November

“Please come back,” Meredith pleaded for the gazillionth time. We were horizontal whilst nursing what can only be described as a cracking hangover. My private locomotive was back in residence and offering trips to the entire world and its mother. Apparently last night we got asked to leave by the restaurant manager. A new low, even for me.

“Meredith.” I winced. “I need to sort myself out.” I sighed and held a hand against my forehead, hoping the incessant pain would stop. “You know, three months ago I started uni with strict rules for myself. No booze, no ciggies, no boys, no home. How many of those have I kept? I’d crumbled within a few days, and what do I have to show for it? I’m lying in my bed at home, nursing a hangover, smoking about forty cigarettes a day after ending an affair with the guy who lives in the room next door.”

She looked at me in silence as we lay next to each other on my king-size.

“If it makes you feel any better, he’s a wreck, too,” she said.

“Mer, that doesn’t make me feel better. I think we just need to realise that we’re not right for each other. I’ll never be confident around him knowing that he can do better. That one day he will do better.”

“He doesn’t want better. He wants you. That’s all he’s ever wanted since the first day. Come on, Lil.”

“Maybe.” For the life of me I was still unable to write us off, I guess that’s why it hurt so much.

“Have you heard from your parents?”

“Nope, and I don’t think I will. I upset Mum shouting at her the way I did.” My cheeks heated. “You know, I’ve been running from one nightmare to another, and it’s not even the last couple of months, I think it’s been my whole life.”

Mer turned to look at me, grimacing is she shuffled onto her side. “I know you think that now, but I do believe this will get better. I believe in you and Ben.” Her words made lame ass tears sting my eyes. “And…” she added, pausing for effect. “I’ve heard you tipped your mum off her orange juice waggon and back onto gin so she’ll forget all about it soon.”

I snorted a laugh. “Yeah, and what about my dad?”

Ha! It’s my trump card.

“Your dad needs to realise you are a grown-up.”

“Yeah he does, but then I guess for him to realise that, I should probably start acting like one.”

I took a deep breath and then told her what she wanted to hear. “I’ll be back after Christmas.”

I knew yesterday, actually, I knew in that tapas restaurant that I have to go back. Otherwise, I’ll just be running forever.

Now I am sitting on my bed trying to cram for my essays. I’m finally starting to understand what I’m writing about, (just shows how much more you can achieve when you do not have one ear permanently superglued to the wall of the room adjoining yours).

Ooh, a text.

Oh.

Ben: Glad you’re coming home.

I have no idea what to reply. I’ll leave it for a while.

Okay, I can’t concentrate on my books until I respond… Um…

Me: So am I. We can be friends, can’t we?

‘Send’.