Page 58 of When We Are Old

Julie.

My stomach dropped and my limbs ached with heaviness.

Determined to stay in the moment, I declined the flashing number and shoved it back in my pocket.

“Everything okay, Matthew?”

Turning, I smiled wide. “Perfect. Now, I don’t suppose you know much about greengrocers, do you?”

Ronnie’s mam flourished like a flower under the midday sun. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been in one.”

I nodded, trying to keep my smile on. “Me too. Would you listen to me talk through some ideas?”

I ignored the vibration of my phone in my pocket, pleased that I could distract her from signing her contract on a retirement apartment.

It seemed wrong to rush.

But then I’d never been one to act on a whim.

I stood on the front doorstep to Ronnie’s house, stretching out my calf muscles when the ringing of my phone became too much.

“What?” I snapped.

“Oh, Matty. There you are. Where have you been?”

I sighed. “I’m away, you know that, Julie.”

“I’ve had problems with Ewan, he wouldn’t go to school.”

The sweat on the back of my neck cooled and I rubbed my hand at the skin. “Why? He loves school.”

“He’s upset. Someone told him you’ve got a new girlfriend, and now he’s beside himself. He won’t stop crying, Matty. Even my mother came to help, but he wouldn’t settle for her either.”

I ground my teeth together.

“Who told him, Julie?”

She didn’t need to answer. I knew well enough. My own family would never do such a thing, not intentionally.

“He said you were a liar, that you’d pretended this woman was a work colleague. That can’t be right can it, Matty? You don’t have a job, do you?”

“You know I’m restarting my dad’s shop.” My tone dropped; aching longing swept through me like a breeze over the desert at my dad’s shop.

“Oh, Matty! Really? How do you plan to keep that running? You hate that shop.”

“I don’t.”

She chuckled, all concern for Ewan washing out of her voice. “You do, you always have. You never wanted to be the son of a greengrocer. Now you’re going to do that to your own children. No wonder Ewan is upset; he’s realised his father is going to be a nobody.”

“Shut up, Julie.” I bent low, trying to block her words. “That’s not true.”

“Darling, the best thing that ever happened to you was me saving you from a future worse than death.”

I straightened, grinding the side of my fist against the red brick of the house. “No, Julie. You ruined me by tying me into it anyway.” I swallowed hard and threw a rope around my unwieldy rage. “Now let me talk to Ewan.”

“You’re going to have to come here and see him. He won’t come out of his room. He says he’s devastated his mam and dad won’t be together.”

“That’s rubbish. He’s been fine.”