Page 116 of Certified To Handle You 2

“You know what it mean,” she replied. “You been seein’ anybody new?”

“Nah.”

Sha’Nelle paused before askin’, “Anybody old?”

I already knew where she was goin’ before she said the name.

“Like Reni?” she added.

The truth sat right here in my mouth, but I couldn’t make myself give it to her. I had told Reni the truth when she asked about somebody else ‘cause lyin’ to her ain’t feel necessary. With Sha’Nelle, I knew one honest answer could close a door I still wanted open.

“Nah,” I lied.

Sha’Nelle stayed quiet, and I couldn’t tell whether she believed me.

I leaned back and said, “I know you still fuckin’ with that nigga though.”

She sighed into the phone. “Renza, I appreciate you callin’ about my grandma, but I gotta go.”

That shit irritated me ‘cause she had just questioned me, then tried to run the second I brought up what she was doin’.

“Why you always do that?” I asked her.

“Do what?”

“Start some shit, then try to get off the phone when it turn toward you.”

“I ain’t start nothin’,” Sha’Nelle replied. “I asked you a question.”

“And I asked you one back.”

“I don’t wanna get into all that tonight,” she said, soundin’ tired now. “I already got enough goin’ on.”

I ran my hand down my face and tried to pull my emotions back before I said the wrong shit. “I miss you, ‘Nelle.”

She went quiet again.

“I love you too,” I continued. “And I know you feel that shit even if you wanna keep actin’ like you don’t.”

“Renza…”

“Nah, just tell me the truth,” I said. “You ain’t gotta tell me you comin’ home or none of that shit. Just quit actin’ like I’m the only one feelin’ this.”

Sha’Nelle took a deep breath on the other end. When she spoke again, her voice sounded softer and more tired than before.

“I miss you too,” she admitted.

Those four words did more to me than I wanted them to.

I closed my eyes and rested my head against the chair ‘cause for one second, it felt like maybe all this shit between us wasn’t dead. She was still there behind the pride, the fear and whatever she had goin’ on with that other nigga.

“I miss you bad,” I told her.

“I know,” Sha’Nelle replied. “I’m just overwhelmed right now, Renza. I don’t wanna get into us tonight.”

“A’ight,” I said, even though I wanted more. “You gon’ call me?”

“I’ll call you soon.”