Page 35 of Darkness Defined

“How many plates do we have?”

“Six.” This was ridiculous. Why wouldn’t I know how many dishes we had?

“How long does it take to get to the dining hall?”

“Seventeen minutes.”

“Was the TA’s hair up or down today?”

“Up.”

“How many students were in class?”

“Nine. Three didn’t show and Ellie had to leave early.”

“What color shirt did I wear yesterday?”

“Blue.”

“How many level ones are left in the world?”

“Five active.”

Alex leveled a look at me.

“What?” I asked.

“You see and hear everything, Matt. You just need to learn to focus it.” He smiled gently. “For the record, I’m assuming most of those were right answers. You tell me what would help. Everyone learns differently. We just need to find your way. Is it quiet study?” He held up the book, and I wrinkled my nose. “Do we need to turn it into a game with flashcards? Or do I just need to re-give every lesson?” None of those options sounded great.

“How should I know?” I’d never excelled in school. I’d always been occupied trying not to get pummeled at every turn. When you were a product of the system, the only one looking out for you was you. But it wasn’t like that here, well, mostly. At Arminius, I was just another student. No one cared where I came from or who I was before. The only problem was that the classes were hard, like really hard. I felt like I was drowning. In class, everything sounded like white noise. How was I supposed to pass when I couldn’t even hear or understand the lecture? For the first time, I actually cared. Besides, what good was being free, if I was only going to end up back on the street?

It had taken a while to sink in, but it finally occurred to me that this was a real opportunity to do something with my life. Asking my roommate to help hadn’t been easy. Just admitting I needed help felt like admitting weakness. And he’d agreed, which I still didn’t understand. No extra conditions or motives, wouldn’t even take payment. He’d called us friends. I’d never had one of those before, had never been in one place long enough to try. And what was more, was that he seemed to genuinely care.

“I think we need a break. I feel like we’re going about this all wrong.” His head flopped on the table. If Alex couldn’t help, I didn’t know what I was going to do.

“It’s okay, if you don’t want to, you know,” I mumbled. It wasn’t fair to hold him on the hook for something so impossible.

Alex looked up at me from the table. “Did I say that?” He straightened back up. “Fine. No break. I want to help, Matt, but you have to give me something to work with.”

“No, I think you’re right. We need a break. Let’s go down to the dining hall.” Maybe food would help me focus.

He frowned. “It’s raining.”

“So, it’ll take nineteen minutes,” I countered.

He chuckled to himself and put the books away. We walked down to the front of the building together and stood staring out the glass doors. It wasn’t storming anymore per se, but the deluge could resume at any moment. The rain had been constant since the thunder had woken me early in the morning, and now lakes of water obscured the normally clear lawn.

Alex glanced over at me, trepidation clearly written on his face. “You know we’re going to get soaked.”

“Yep.”

“And we’re actually doing this?”

“Yep.” I looked at him, but he still seemed uncertain. “Race you.” He barely had a chance to look confused before I was out the door. I heard the door behind me and knew he was following.

We were drenched in seconds, but kept going, laughing as we went. Other students gave us strange looks from beneath their umbrellas as we flew past. Water splashed up from each step. Running in the rain felt like being a kid all over again, except this time there was no mean matron to complain about puddles on the floor.

The dining hall came into view and I realized a fresh problem. I couldn’t stop. My shoes and the ground were both too wet. I crashed into the building, skidding and sliding until I finally came to a halt. Alex had the same realization half a second after I did and came careening in behind me. I braced myself to catch him and we almost cracked skulls. Between his momentum and my soggy shoes, even hanging onto each other for support, we could barely keep our feet beneath us.