Page 31 of She is Mine

“Birthdays,” I say a little bitterly, remembering my eighth birthday party. I spent the whole night waiting for him to show up, but when I called him after, I found out he’d never even made it to the airport. “Christmas, a few times. I’m not sure what could possibly be so important that he’d miss Christmas but he did anyway. Like I said. I’m used to it by now.”

“Work can be...demanding,” Ryker grunts. “But we have to make time for things that are important. I’m sorry that he couldn’t be here.”

I glance over at him. I never thought a man as tough as Ryker would be so understanding, so emotionally intelligent. And yet maybe I did know all along. Maybe it’s what attracted me to him so naturally in the first place.

“Thank you. And thank you for taking his place. It’s nice to see a familiar face on a day like today.”

“Are you nervous?”

Yes...but not so much for the interview,I almost say. I’m much more nervous about the fact that the man of my dreams is sitting right beside me. I turn away to look out of the window so that he can’t see my face.

“A little.”

“Tell me about the job.”

I feel a warmth growing inside me. Is he actually taking an interest in me and my work? The thought that he actually cares makes my cheeks warm up.

“I majored in communications and media. I’m interviewing for a role in social media.”

“Social media? Interesting,” Ryker says. “I think you’ll be perfect for the role. And I’m sure if you’re anything like your father, you’ll ace the interview. You come across very well.”

Now I’m definitely blushing. He seems to know exactly how to get under my skin. It only makes him more attractive to me. It feels like he knows me so well, even though we’ve only been talking for a few minutes. It makes me want to get to know him in other ways. The back seat seems like a perfect place to get to know his body that’s for sure.

I blink several times, trying to snap myself out of this mood I’m in. I’m not here to fall in love. I’m here to ace my interview and get myself a good job…

But if I move out here to the city, then I’d be able to see Ryker whenever I want. Is it too wild to dream that he might want to see me again after today? I saw the way he looked at me when I walked up to him in the airport. It makes me think that I didn’t imagine the chemistry between us the last time we met. It makes me feel like maybe thereispotential between us…

If only my father wasn’t standing in our way.

The problem is, even if we did want to be together, there’s no way my father would allow it to happen. I might be angry at him today, but I still respect him. I don’t want to go against him by running off with his best friend.

But what about my own happiness? It’s never the thing I consider first. Even after all the times, my father has let me down, I always end up putting him first. Even though he never considers my happiness, I always make sure that I don’t do anything to upset him. So why don’t I put myself first for once? Why don’t I allow myself to indulge in Ryker, to fall head over heels, to see where this might go?

And now, I’ve truly made up my mind.

If Ryker makes a move for me, I’ll let this thing unfold.

Ryker

It’s almost impossible to concentrate on the road. My eyes keep drifting over to the gorgeous creature sitting in my passenger seat.

We’ve been driving for almost forty-five minutes now, and the city is coming into view. It won’t be long now until I’m dropping her off for her interview and this thing between us will come to an end once again. Her father asked me to drop her off, but he said he’d pick her up himself. I won’t even get a chance to explore the things I’ve been feeling for the past three years.

Maybe it’s for the best. She can’t possibly want to be with me. She’s too young, too free. She could have anyone she wants. And yet, every time our eyes meet, I feel a flicker of hope. I feel like I’m looking into her eyes and seeing my own feelings mirrored in her gaze. I feel as though she’s feeling exactly the way I am.

I shouldn’t indulge in these thoughts. I should push them to the back of my mind and just think about the road ahead of me. But the road ahead seems dark and worthless without her by my side. I should’ve made her mine three years ago when I saw her for the first time, but I let her father stand in my way. I thought that I had to because she was so young. She was only eighteen then. But now she’s flourished into this beautiful woman. She’s so enigmatic that her presence feels like it fills the entire car with personality. She’s everything I’ve always dreamed of, but I keep telling myself that I don’t deserve her, that I can’t have her.

But why? If she was mine, I’d give her the world. I’d love her better than any other man in the world is capable of. I’d protect her until my dying day and make sure she has everything she could possibly need and more. She’d have a good life with a man like me. No other man could please her the way I can. I’d give her impossible pleasure whenever she demanded it. I’d worship her body and make her come over and over again. I’ll fill her up with babies and give her the family I know she’s dreamed of as much as I have.

So what’s stopping me?

Her father is only a man. He’s just one person. Am I really going to allow him to stop me from being happy? He might be my best friend, but he’s proved how selfish he can be. I look at Taylor and I can see that she’s broken by the way he’s tossed her aside so casually. I grip the steering wheel until my knuckles turn white, trying not to howl out in this anger that consumes me. He doesn’t deserve to dictate her life when all he’s done is let her down.

Now it’s my turn to care for her.

We’re getting close to our destination. If I’m going to act, it has to be soon. I’m running out of time. Taylor sits up straighter in her seat, sucking air in between her teeth. I can tell she’s nervous. She wipes her palms on her dress and smooths them down as we stop at a traffic light.

“I didn’t expect to be this nervous,” she says, glancing up at me. I wonder how much I’m contributing to her nerves.