Page 17 of Xane

CHAPTER EIGHT

–ZORA –

My scream is without sound while I try to fight.The finality of life as I knew it along with the numbness of the drugs kept my mind and body in a state of nothingness.Not living, not struggling, no nothing.Now?The horror fragments of memories are assaulting my dreams, and I find the strength to fight.

“Stop.”The word comes through the haze inside my mind.

The voice doesn’t belong to Ramiro, and I keep fighting.

More words follow, and the familiarity of the voice finally penetrates.“You’re stuck in the blankets, dammit.”

I can feel the tug and when he snaps, “Sawbones, open your eyes,” I comply.

It’s the nickname he uses.His nickname for me is in the memory I use to crawl into my own head and slam the walls up around me to be able to ignore what’s happening.My eyes fly open when I feel a hand on my leg.I scramble back in a panic and tumble off the bed, landing hard on my ass.

The muttered curse flowing through the air isn’t mine.No sound can pass my lips or more pain will follow.Ramiro’s rules.Something I learned the hard way the first few days I was taken.The shape of a man enters my vision and I move on my hands and feet to get away as fast as I can manage.

“Calm your shit, Z.No one is going to hurt you.It’s just you and me here, okay?”His words make me pause and I glance up into his bright blue eyes.

Grayer squats down and gives me a warm smile.“There you are.Want to crawl back into bed?”

He slowly holds his hand out and waits for me to reach for him.He doesn’t force his touch on me, and if there’s anyone I trusted in this fucked-up world it used to be Grayer.Until he left town a decade ago without saying goodbye.

Taking a deep breath, I reach for the bed and pull myself up.I grit my teeth at the pain flaring through me.Ivy wanted me to go to the hospital to get a scan and make sure nothing was broken.I refused.Especially since she told me how Grayer could keep everything under wraps if I stayed at his clubhouse.

I don’t want anyone to know, and the pain I feel from the beatings Ramiro gave me doesn’t involve broken bones.My mind might be troubled, but at least my education and training didn’t fail me.The twisted idiot preferred to punish me in different ways, by whipping my breasts for instance.

“Ivy?”I croak, hating how weak my voice sounds.

Grayer rises to his full height and takes a seat on the bed while I scoot back to lean against the headrest.

“I think she’s with her old man in one of the guestrooms.They’re probably still sleeping.Need me to get her?”He reaches for his phone.“They might not be sleeping because she volunteered to take your shifts at the clinic.I do have another Broken Deeds old lady coming here for you.Lynn, she’s my president’s mother.”

I eye his cut and what he just mentioned really doesn’t make any sense.

“Right.I probably should explain.The reason I came back to town and took the gavel was to investigate my father’s death.I’m a member of Spence’s Broken Deeds MC New Jersey chapter.We work undercover for the government to solve crime cases.I was too damn focused on running background information, checking out the members and people who might be involved.I don’t know if you noticed the spiking crime in town?Well, we’ve been working on trying to find out who’s behind it.”He shakes his head and releases a frustrating breath.“All while I should have kept my word and picked you up after work.None of it would have happened.”

His words process and it’s a bit out there to believe he’s part of a motorcycle club who works for the government.An undercover agent.Damn.How long has he been an undercover agent?Is that why he had to leave?My mind spirals until his last line snags my attention.Why would he blame himself?