Page 40 of Cessation
“I will do that.”
A kiss was placed on my lips and the contact we quickly shared lingered momentarily.
“Breakfast was delicious much like yourself. I’ll hit you later.”
I nodded and he left me to my lonesome. I didn’t move a muscle until I heard the front door shut. Once it did, I anxiously dialed Calina’s number. I needed her to meet me at my house as soon as possible. My head was spinning, and I didn’t know what to do or think. So much was presented to me in a twenty-four-hour span.
She never answered but shot me with a text instead.
What’s up Yani?
Are you busy?
Not for real. I’m picking something up for Derrick but that’s about it. Why?
I’m in a fuckin’ twilight zone. I need you to come to the crib ASAP.
Give me twenty minutes.
After agreeing, I threw the phone on the counter, then headed upstairs to put some clothes on. Lina was going to be mind fucked the same way I was, and drinks could be in the future for us. By the time I was presentable and stepping off the steps, she was pulling in. I went straight for the door with the gift bag in tow.
When I seen she got out with a bottle of alcohol, I felt relieved. She understood the assignment without me having to go into details. I was sure she heard the words twilight zone and thought the worse. I stood with the door open waiting for her to reach me.
“You pulled me away from my man. This better be alcohol worthy.” She held up the bottle and passed by me entering the crib heading straight for the kitchen.
I followed behind and let her do her thing. She grabbed two shot glasses, us a Red Bull a piece, and took a seat at the island beside me. Before she popped the top, she reached over and gave me a genuine hug. It was one that I needed. The shots began right after.
“So, you know I’ve been spending time with Paxton and everything, right? Well, we kind of had a talk last night and although we didn’t become exclusive, we set boundaries for us not dealing with anyone else. However, when I was fixing him breakfast this morning, this came.”
I slid the bag in her direction, and she gave me a look asking what the fuck it was. I was just waiting on her reaction after she read the card. I knew how she would react to the ring, but I was sure all that would change once she realized who it was from.
Like expected, she checked out the ring first. “Friend, this is absolutely beautiful. Did Paxton do this?” I said nothing as she kept digging and came across the card. I allowed her to take her time, but she didn’t even get off the first line good before sheclosed it and dropped it back inside. “You would be a damn fool if you entertained whatever it is he said.”
“Lina —”
“Don’t say my name Yani because you know I’m right. I witnessed you shed way too many tears behind his ass these last few years. This ring is supposed to do what… signify his love for you?”
“I don’t know but it has me conflicted now more than ever.”
I dropped my head, and she poured us up a double shot. We both sat there in silence for minutes at a time repeating the same motion. I hadn’t felt the effects of the liquor and I was guessing that it was due to how stressed out I was.
“Alright, this is me not being judgmental because I’ve been through this with Marlon. Love is so damn tricky and can steer us in the wrong direction sometimes. With me, I just knew Marlon was the one and that eventually he would get his shit together. I endured so much because of him promising me that he would marry me and do right by me. You know what I went through Yani.”
“I do, and I thought about it countless times. Why do you think I called you and no one else? You know how I feel about Trust so I was hoping you could talk some sense into me.”
“Yeah, I do. I also know how many times you called me crying, yelling, and screaming about Trust as well. You wanting me to talk sense into you means you pretty much made your mind up. What is the purpose behind this?”
Taking the shot that was poured, I thought on it all. It was clear that Trust was proposing to me, but I was forming something good with Pax. He was such a sweetheart, and the treatment was ten times better. I had security with him but when it came to Trust, I had nothing but doubts running through my mind.
“He wants me back and if you would’ve read the card then you would’ve seen that he proposed. He wants me to meet him at The Cartel tonight to tell him yes or no. The thing is, I don’t know what my response is for real.”
“Paxton is a good guy Yani. I’ve seen you genuinely smile behind him just being mentioned. You didn’t hold this light when you dealt with Trust. It’s a no brainer.”
It truly wasn’t but comfortability versus new beginnings had presented itself. On one hand, I knew what Trust was about. His fuck up was Xara but outside of her, he was a standup guy. Paxton brought on such good vibes that I believed every word that left his lips. I knew where I should stay but Brendon played a factor as well. He didn’t bother to give Paxton a chance. He loved his father and wanted us to work out our issues. I was in turmoil.
Calina getting a call from Derrick was exactly what I needed. She left, giving me some time to decide whether Trust was getting his visit or not. I could easily ignore his request and continue my life with Paxton, or I could show and hear him out.
I continued to drink and let the liquor take control. Within the next hour, I was getting dressed and heading to Trust with the ring in tow. He wanted an answer in person and I had one for him.
