Page 65 of Not So Fast
“Of course I’m okay with it. I just…” She looked off and he could tell those gears in her head were turning.
“Look at me.” He redirected her vision to him. “This is not a big deal. We’re talking about a meal with you and me and your mom.”
“Okay.” She nodded, but didn’t seem convinced. He hoped like hell that her attitude about this was more about her need to take things slowly and not about him.
“How do you want to handle Silverstone? Do we go on pretending we aren’t together? Because something about that doesn’t feel right.” He’d already brought up one uncomfortable subject. Might as well tackle another.
Mia exhaled. “I still think we’re asking for trouble if we let people know we’re a couple. I’m not ready for that heat from my listeners. You’d have Isabel to answer to. And everyone else will likely lose their collective minds. I don’t think we’d get the same attention as Florian and Emma, but more people know who I am now. I did that interview with Claudia. My subscriber numbers keep climbing.”
Secrecy and sneaking around weren’t part of what Xander wanted with Mia, but once again, it felt like the prudent thing to follow her lead.
“Lord knows we wouldn’t want to end up as Xandia.”
“Or worse, Miander.”
Thirteen
What is your biggest flaw? What does it say about you?
This one is almost too easy. I’m a perfectionist. Some people might call that an asset. I know for a fact my perfectionism got me to Formula One. It is a sport built on the slimmest of margins—fractions of a second between you and a competitor, inches between you and a fiery crash. Working hard to eradicate mistakes and eliminate those margins made me a good driver. The only problem is that real life isn’t like that, and I sometimes have a hard time switching gears (ha).
Mum has had a tough few days. Not that I thought she and Dad would be here for the race today, but I don’t like knowing they are at home dealing with something far more important than racing, and I have work to attend to. I did well in qualifying yesterday. P6. A podium finish is within reach. And I feel like I can taste it.
This race means so much. Almost too much. My home country.The GP I’ve attended so many times with my dad. Oscar and Freya are here. So that’s nice. And Mia, of course. She flies home tomorrow and we’re continuing this charade where we pretend like we hardly know each other. I only see her in the motorhome.
It feels wrong. It weighs on me. But life isn’t perfect, right? I need to remember that.
“Bloody hell. It’s true. It’s official.” Freya, sitting on one of the bench seats in the motorhome, swiped away at her phone. “Florian and Emma really are no more, already.”
“Is there confirmation?” Mia asked, sitting across from her.
Freya handed over her phone. “Emma issued a statement.”
Mia read, then returned the device to Freya, shaking her head. “That poor woman. She couldn’t handle the pressure. She said it. The press followed her everywhere while she was in England this week.”
“They were together a sum total of ten days.” Freya sighed.
“Which is like five years for a nonfamous couple,” Mia added.
“RIP Flemma. My sister might never be the same,” Oscar quipped.
Mia slid a glance in Xander’s direction. “If Emma Taylor-Ross can’t handle the pressure of the media microscope, who can? She’s a huge actress. Her face is on the side of buses. She’s used to having her life revealed for all to see.”
“Everyone is different.” Xander closed up his journal and ducked back into the bedroom to stow it. Writing down his feelings might have helped him today. Sure, it had stirred up a whole lot of the things on his mind, but it also allowed himto offload his thoughts so he could focus on the race.Huh.Perhaps Mia had been right all along.
“Freya and Oscar, I love you both, but I need a private moment with Mia and then I need to go to work.”
Oscar sprang from his seat and saluted. “Right-o. We’ll get out of your hair.”
“Apparently, our brother needs a good-luck snog for the road.” Freya looped her cross-body bag over her head.
“Brilliant. Then go on.” With a nod, Xander shooed them out.
“We’re going, we’re going.” Freya dutifully followed Oscar down the stairs and outside, punctuating her exit with a slam of the door.
Mia immediately gripped Xander’s shoulders and looked him square in the eye. “Is everything okay with you? You seem preoccupied. You’re going to do great today. You know that, right?”
“Freya was driving me barmy with her nonstop talk about Flemma.” He took a deep breath and let himself get lost in Mia’s eyes for a moment. Just like the journal, she helped him smooth off his ragged edges. She was his respite. Always there for him. Always supportive.
