No matter what they thought.
“I’m taking your advice,” he stated as he pulled back. “I’m hopping on a plane tonight so I can be with Justin. Even though he says he doesn’t need me, I know better. And that’s my job to know these things. As his submissive, I owe it to both of us to be there so he doesn’t have to be alone.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Is there anything you need me to do? I can book the flight or a hotel if you need.”
“I took care of it already, but thank you.”
Ben cupped my face, then leaned down and pressed his lips to mine in a chaste kiss that made all the love I had for him come to the forefront. Again, I fought the tears, not wanting him to think I was weak.
“All right then. You go deal with Langston and I’ll call you tomorrow to let you know how things are going.”
“Okay.”
I took a deep breath and turned toward Langston’s door.
Now for the hard part.
Forty-Six
AFTER RAPPING MY KNUCKLES ON Langston’s door, I waited for him to respond before I turned the knob and stepped inside. Langston was at his desk, and I was surprised to see Landon in there with him.
“You wanted to see me?” I purposely kept from referring to him by his name or by his honorific. I was through playing this game with them.
It didn’t matter that they weren’t the cause of my outburst, I knew that it all came down to them. To this thing between us. Or lack thereof.
“I do,” he responded, then motioned me toward the sofa. “Have a seat. Let’s talk.”
He got up from his desk chair and moved over to the sofa. I sat on the one across from him, while Landon moved to sit beside me, keeping a good foot between us. I could sense the tension in the room. It was so powerful it made it difficult to breathe.
“Is there something you need to talk to us about?” Langston prompted.
I sat up straight. “Not at the moment, no.”
Perhaps I was being childish, but I honestly didn’t have anything to say. Not to them and not to anyone else. I felt as though I’d been discarded and I wasn’t about to grovel at their feet. They’d already had months to figure this out. If they didn’t know me well enough by now, then that was on them.
Langston’s eyebrow lifted skeptically. “Care to explain the argument you had with Ben?”
No, I really didn’t, but I couldn’t very well tell him that. They were still my employers. “It was a misunderstanding and I apologized to him for my outburst.”
“This seems to be a trend,” he noted, his eyes narrowed on me.
I shrugged, feeling unapologetic despite the fact that he was right. I was out of control and I was taking it out on everyone else.
“Is something going on that we should know about, Luci?”
I glanced between him and Landon. “I’m not sure what you mean.”
“Are you unhappy here?”
“No,” I blurted. Damn. That wasn’t it at all. “I’m very happy here.” My issues had nothing to do with work.
“I’ve noticed all the responsibilities you’ve taken on the past couple of weeks,” Landon stated. “I have to say, I’m very impressed. And pleased.”
I sighed, thankful that he wasn’t making this personal, although we all knew that it was. “Thank you. It’s been a pleasure to be able to handle more. I’m capable of doing more than answering phones and making coffee.” I waved my hand. “And I don’t mean that in a negative way.”
“Is there something going on in your personal life that you want to discuss?” Langston probed.
As though he didn’t already know. It angered me that he was pretending he hadn’t spent the night with me not too long ago. I had opened up to him then. Why was he acting like he was in the dark?
God, I hated how sterile this conversation was. It was as though I hadn’t spent the past four months getting to know them, the past three being intimate with these men. For some reason, they’d relegated me to the hired help and I wasn’t sure why that was.
Or maybe I was doing that. In an effort to put some distance between us, maybe I was the one who was putting up walls, purposely having confrontations. I didn’t like that it could be true. That wasn’t in my nature.
I shook my head and sighed. “No. There’s no issues in my personal life.” That was a bold-faced lie, but I didn’t care.
If they could sit here and act indifferent toward me, then I could return the favor. I was tired of playing these games and getting nowhere. Sure, I’d signed on for that in the beginning, but as the time had passed and I’d grown to care about these men, I felt they owed me more.
