Page 80 of Wildfire
Of all the ways I overthink, I can’t believe I’ve never thought about this. My brain is scrambling for a response and doesn’t find one, but luckily I’m saved when the ice cream store owner who served us earlier approaches our table. “Are y’all the folks opening a strip club?”
Chapter Twenty-SixRUSS
“I’VE NEVER KNOWN SOMEONE WHO’Sdefinitely getting head today look so fucking miserable.”
I don’t realize I’ve zoned out until I hear Xander say the wordsheadandfucking miserable. “I’m not definitely getting head later, but I will try to cheer up. Sorry, man.”
After the whole food hall sang “Happy Birthday” to me this morning, Xander announced we were spending our day off seeing what Meadow Springs has to offer. I told him I already know the answer and it’s not a lot, but he was insistent, saying now that he and Rory have joint custody of me I couldn’t not go with him when I went with her yesterday.
It’s a nice sentiment, but there’s only so much mini golf two men can play.
Normally, I’d spend my day off hanging around to see Rory, but after our conversation about fame and privacy yesterday, a bit of distance for a few hours is letting me think clearly. I can’t think properly when I’m around her, and I need to start using my brain again because I haven’t been recently.
Stopping at the Drunk Duck, the one bar available, Xander andI decided to grab some burgers before heading back to camp. I’ve spent the entire meal half listening, half trapped in my head.
“I’m pretty sure birthday head is in the Constitution,” he jokes, causing me to choke on my soda. “Ha, got you to laugh, you miserable shit. What’s going on? Tell Uncle Xan.”
“Did you just call yourself Uncle Xan?”
“Well I can’t call myself Daddy Xan, can I? I know how to read a room. So go on, what’s jumped up your ass?”
My knee-jerk reaction is to turn the conversation around and make it about Xander, but I think it’d be good to get his opinion. We’ve been sharing the same space for weeks now, and he’s a genuinely good guy, so I decide to chance it. “I’m wondering if I should call it a day with Aurora.”
“You’re fucking lying,” he says, watching for my reaction. “Say you’re joking right now.”
“We almost got caught this week. I opened the door just as Jenna showed up. If she’d arrived two minutes earlier she’d have caught me—Well, it doesn’t matter, but she would have caught me doing something that would get me sent home.”
“Two people sneaking around almost get caught. Yeah, that’s how it tends to go, bro. It’s half the fun, and do you even care about going home anymore? We’re almost done anyway, and your friend said you could always crash with him if you need to. You’re too smart to think I’d believe this is about getting caught. What’s the real reason?”
I have to give it to Xander, he has a point. I’ve definitely been more relaxed after my friends encouraged me to risk getting fired and JJ gave me somewhere to go if I needed it until I have the excuse of college assignments and hockey to keep me unavailable. “Have I ever told you I’m not trying to go pro?”
He puts his burger down, wiping his hands and mouth on his napkin, and leans back against the booth, focusing on me. “No, you haven’t mentioned it. Why not? What’s that got to do with Rory?”
“I don’t want to be famous. I don’t want to have strangers potentially poking around my life or get attention in the public eye. It’s my worst nightmare, and I don’t love hockey enough to give up my privacy like that.”
“Okay, and…?”
“And she’s already famous. I googled her last night and there’s so much about her family, there’s even photos of Emilia. It’s just a lot. I knew about her dad, but I don’t really feel like I knew the full extent of it if that makes sense. Because she’s Rory and she’s the way she is and I forget that outside of camp she has a whole other life.”
“A whole other life that she came here to escape.” Xander takes a long sip of his beer, and it’s the most serious I’ve seen him. “I need to know if you know what you’re saying is wild and you just need my reassurance, or if you genuinely believe it. Because I can deal with a little it’s-getting-too-real crisis, but if you actually think you should break things off with her, I don’t know how to help you, bro.”
“You think I’m being a dick, don’t you?”
Xander shrugs, and it’s the yes he wants to say, but won’t, because he’s a good friend. I probably am being a dick, but I also know that things don’t go well for me in life. It’s hard not to get wrapped up in the good things, since they happen so infrequently in comparison.
Xander sighs and I feel it in my bones. “I think you’re finding an issue where there doesn’t need to be one. Think of any famous person with a nonfamous girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend, whatever. Tell me something outrageous about them. Think of their deepest, darkest secret, the one thing in the world they wanted nobody to know but came out anyway.” I’m totally blank. “You can’t, because people don’t give a shit. You thought about dropping your friends that just went pro? Your now-famous friends?”
I’d never want to cut out Nate or JJ. “Never even crossed my mind.”
“Isn’t your brother in a band, too? What happens when he getsmega famous? You’ll be Aurora-less and in the exact same situation. You clearly really like her and she stares at you like you hung the fucking moon. So just be together and don’t stress for once.”
It’s like being doused in cold water. I’d never want to give up the way she looks at me. “You’re right, man. I dunno. I think I’m just in my feelings.”
“That’s okay. Feelings are good.” He pulls out his cell phone, glancing at the screen briefly and immediately putting it back into his pocket. “Nothing good comes from bottling shit up. For the record, I think you’re being a fool because your chemistry is wild. She’s great. You’re great. I bet the se—”
“Watch it…”
“So protective, jeez. But my point stands. What could you possibly do or have done that’s so bad you’d give up someone who makes you happy. It’s not like you’re getting married, but I get it, it’s not something that’s going to go away in the future. But when did she stop being worth the risk?”
