Page 96 of Gunner

I was going to have three babies.

As soon as the words registered, I couldn’t stop the big smile from appearing on my face.

“What the fuck are you smiling at, Ditch Digger!? You’ve maimed her!” Bailey shouted.

“I have a magic dick.”

“What?” all the women gasped, turning to look at me.

I couldn’t believe it.

I’m a stud.

I knew my dick was special, but I never imagined this.

Holy shit!

I didn’t just implant one kid, not two, but three!

I had super human sperm!

I needed to tell my brothers!

Rushing from the room, I raced through the waiting room and outside, where my brothers were waiting patiently, and shouted for the whole damn town to hear.

“I HAVE SUPER SPERM!”

“I win,” Priest said, smiling. “I knew he’d lose his shit today.”

“He doesn’t look stupefied?” Pyro said, glaring at me as if I’d grown another head. “He looks...hell, I don’t know what he looks like. Gunner, help a brother out. What the fuck are you talking about?”

“I have a magical dick!”

“See, he’s lost the plot,” Priest grinned. “Pay up, asshole.”

“Gunner, take a deep breath and explain,” King groaned, shaking his head.

“Triplets!” I shouted, as my brothers all stared at me in horror, as if I was speaking a foreign language. “We are having three babies. Triplets!”

“A thousand bucks on all three being girls,” Scribe bellowed as my brothers all started placing their bets.

Three babies.

I was going to have three babies.

Oh God!

I WAS GOING TO HAVE THREE BABIES!

And... that’s when I passed the fuck out.

THE END