Page 27 of Love Me (Touch of Death 3)
“We’ve already spoken about this.”
“I need you, Sasha.” I step forward and place my palms on the warm skin of his chest. “I’m sorry I hurt you.” I don’t know how many times I have to do this with him, but I’ll do it a hundred more if needed.
Without thought, I push up on tiptoes and slam my lips over his. For one timeless heartbeat, I feel as though he could save me from everything, even myself. He freezes, muscles tensing, and I expect him to pull away. My fingers wind around the back of his neck, and my nails rake over his skin. Like a man coming up for air, he seems to come alive. Hands glide around my waist, fingers clinging to the material of my dress. My heart leaps into a sprint, and instincts override rationale. As he tugs me against him, I feel so small and vulnerable, yet utterly safe, invincible. The kiss goes from tentative to hard and desperate. His grip on me becomes painful, but I don’t care, because he’s slipping, losing that tight rein he keeps on his control. I almost feel the moment he cracks, and I didn’t realize how much I needed him to. It’s both a blessing and a curse because he ignites something in me that I thought long gone from the second I knew what he did. I’m reminded of how alive he makes me feel, how much I crave this.
As quickly as it began, it stops. Sasha yanks away from me, stumbling back a step and snatching his hands away as if I’d burned him.
“You’re going to marry Matteo. I have a life. I can’t do this with you again.”
“I didn’t agree to marry Matteo. I turned him down,” I say.
His brows pinch together. “You shouldn’t have. You’ll need his help.”
I hold up my hand. “I don’t want his help, not at that cost. I don’t need anyone, except you and Gabi. I’m fed up with being a pawn.”
He pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes. “It’s not that simple, Adelina. Power comes at a price. Did you think this would be easy? Without sacrifice? You’re in it now. Fonzo is dead, and you’re right; they will be coming for you. The only way out now is to win.”
“So you think I should just agree to another marriage? Secure the win?”
Something volatile and untamed flashes through his irises and his fists clench. “This is the path you chose.”
Very real emotions fight their way to the surface, bringing a wall of pain that steals my breath. “I forked off the path! You were supposed to be waiting for me when I came back.” I suck in a sharp breath. “And now you tell me to get into another man’s bed.”
A snarl pulls at his lips as he almost lunges at me. “What do you want me to say, Adelina? You made it clear time and time again that your end goal was all that mattered. First, it was killing Enrique, now it’s taking his place. I know how this ends, so don’t expect me to care.” He grits his teeth and balls his fists. His eyes close on an exhaled breath. “Don’t make me care for you. Please.”
“I loved you,” I choke. Once again, the lines are blurring between past and present, lies and truth.
He snaps back instantly, that feral wildness in his eyes scaring me. “And I loved you and you left!”
“But not this time. You told me to take Matteo’s offer, and I didn’t.”
“Because you don’t want to be a pawn.”
“Because of you!”
He stills, and for long moments, neither of us says anything. The silence is interrupted only by our angry, rapid breaths. Warm air blows over my lips on every exhale, and my heart thrums in my chest. I need to get close to him. I need him to want me again, but this is more than that. These feelings are real. It’s like my heart refuses to listen to what my mind knows; that Sasha killed Daddy. My heart is deaf and blind to the truth, besieged by frail emotions. I still love him, and I don’t know how that’s possible.
His jaw tics before he speaks through gritted teeth. “Don’t ask me to love you, Adelina.”
I rush the small gap between us, placing my palm flush to his cheek. An ocean of pain and deceit and lies stretches between us, but beneath it all is something raw, something that no amount of hatred or bad deeds seems to be able to erase. I’m treading on dangerous ground with him.
“I still love you,” I whisper over his lips.
His eyes slam closed, and a small line sinks between his brows. “I can’t love you and lose you again,” he breathes, the words like a sordid confession.
