Page 51 of Loathe Me (Touch of Death 1)
“How? By offering yourself instead? What will that do? The family will have no leader. The Ricci name will disintegrate to nothing. I know you won’t allow that.”
A beat of silence. “He doesn’t want me. I tried. He’s always had a thing for you.”
“I hate him. I’ve always hated him.”
“I know, and that’s probably why he’s so determined to have you. You’re rebellious. Powerful men do not like to be told no. He’ll want to tame you.”
I’ll show him tame. I clench my fist, allowing my nails to cut into my palm. “I’ll go to him,” I say.
“No,” she snaps.
“You know he won’t stop. Just tell Sasha to let me go. If I can get close, I can kill him.” I close my eyes and I can picture Enrique’s smug face as I drive a blade through his throat.
“No, with the chain of succession—”
“Fuck your politics, Gabriella!” She never thinks of anything else.
“If we kill Enrique, they will probably kill us both in retribution! With Alberto as successor, it would have been fine, but with him dead…”
“Alberto is dead?”
“Sasha didn’t tell you? He killed him.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, stashing that bit of information for later. “It doesn’t matter. He has to die, and right now, I’m the only one who can get close. Just give Sasha the word.”
“Never. You will stay with Nero and Sasha until I can fix this.”
“Stop treating me like a child! You’re trying to keep me caged like some fragile bird. I am not your baby sister anymore, Gabriella.” She’s been doing this ever since Mama died when I was ten.
“I’m sorry, Lina. You’ll always be my baby sister, and I’ll protect you, even if it’s from yourself.”
“Gabriella!”
“I love you.”
She hangs up, and I want to scream in frustration. My life is not my own. Whether it was my father, or Enrique, or Gabriella, I have no say. Opening the door, I put the phone on one of the small side tables in the hallway. Even with the opportunity, I have no one to call. I have no one at all.
I go back into my room and lay down on the bed. My heart pounds against my ribs, and I want to tear open my own skin and crawl out of it. I’m confined, and the walls feel like they’re pressing in on me. Zeus whines, resting his head on my lap. He knows I’m completely alone in this world, maybe he feels it in the air, an aura of desperation and sadness. After a while, even he gets up and scratches at the door to be let out. I let him go and resume my position on the bed. The sun has only just set, but I close my eyes all the same. Life is easier when I’m asleep, mainly because I don’t have to actually live it.
My lungs strain and my heart pounds with every frantic step I race. I don’t know where I’m going, only that I need to get there now. The road before me is straight, but the walls on either side are closing in. Closer, closer until they threaten to crush me. I push my legs harder, sprinting toward a tiny glimmer of light ahead, but I’m not going to make it. A cry of desperation slips past my lips as I dive forward. Suddenly the walls and the road are gone, and I’m standing in the hallway of my family home. Confusion clings to me like a fog. My knees tremble, and my lungs heave for air, but I stumble forward and around the corner into the living room. My father sits on a chair, and next to him is my sister on another chair. Tears leak from her eyes, but her expression is impassive, and her hands rest casually on her thighs.
“Gabi.” I step forward.
“Run,” she whispers.
Something brushes over the back of my neck, and I’m paralyzed. I try to move my feet, but I’m frozen where I stand.
“Adelina Ricci,” a voice behind me says. It’s Enrique Bianchi, but I can’t bring myself to turn much less look. “So pretty. So wild.” Warm breath rushes over the side of my neck, and a shiver of revulsion works down my spine.
“You will not have her,” my father says, though his voice is wrong, flat.
“Oh, but I will.”
A gunshot rings in my ears, and Daddy’s head snaps back, hanging at an unnatural angle. And I swear, I hear every drop of blood as it splatters on the floor—an echo of crimson drops.
I don’t know if it’s me screaming or Gabi. But the horrible sound doesn’t stop when he kills Gabi, and it’s just me. Screaming, and screaming.
“Malyshka!”
I lurch awake, unable to breathe. My throat squeezes tight, and I choke on nothing. My chest heaves on heavy sobs, and it hurts, everything hurts. A hand lands on the back of my head before I’m pulled against a hard chest. I don’t fight it because I can’t. I’m powerless, ruined. The tears keep coming, as though my soul is purging all its sorrows in one ugly torrent.
