Page 23 of In His Skates

“Fine. Don’t bitch about it later.” He grabs my phone and says sweetly, “Hey, Bobbi.”

“Don’t you dare use that fake voice with me.” The audio is connected to the car speaker, so I hear Bobbi’s pissed-off tone loud and clear. “What the hell is going on, Leigh? Why were you hanging out with the devil’s spawn?”

Shit. Letting Bobbi believe I hooked up with Keanu wasn’t my finest moment.

“Devil’s spawn?” he asks, and I don’t need to see the look on my face to know he’s beyond pissed. I know how my voice gets when I’m about to go nuclear on someone.

“You know, I’m still here, Bobbi,” I pipe up in Keanu’s voice so Bobbi won’t say more insulting things about him.

“Great. That’s just fucking great. Leigh, are you still planning to go to your interview with the witch? It’ll be bad if you cancel, but it’ll be worse if you simply don’t show up.”

“What time is the interview?” Keanu asks.

“Jesus Christ. I added it to your calendar. It’s at four.”

“Yeah, I’ll be there.”

I give him a look that says Are you fucking crazy? Maybe I should keep that expression locked in, because it seems to be the theme of the day.

“You’d better be, or Gene will kill us both. Anyway, I’ll let you get back to… whatever it is you’re doing with Keanu. Call me when you regain your sanity.”

“Will do, Bobbi. Byeee!”

“God, I’m in so much trouble,” I say. “Bobbi will never forgive me for blowing him off like that.”

“Man, I knew you hated me, but what did I ever do to Bobbi?”

My jaw drops. “You’re joking, right?”

“Why would I joke about that?”

“Oh my God. Why am I even surprised? You never paid attention to anyone else but yourself.”

“Pot, meet kettle.”

“I’m not self-centered,” I hiss.

“You clearly are. Why else would Ophelia say we need to pay attention to me?”

“She said pay attention to each other, dumbass.”

He pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m trying here, Leigh, I really am, but you make it so fucking hard. Just tell me already why Bobbi hates my guts.”

“Fine. Do you really want to know?”

“Yeah, I really want to know.”

“You told everyone in high school that Bobbi was gay.”

“That’s bullshit! I never said he was gay.”

“Oh my God. I heard you.”

“You were hearing things, then, because I never said Bobbi was gay.”

I clench my jaw and count to ten. I have to remember that I can’t go smacking Keanu upside the head while I’m in his body. I’d only be hurting myself.

“You implied it, which is basically the same thing.”