Page 24 of Operation Daddy

Fletch smiled, making July want to sigh. He was so gorgeous. “I’m not bothered by shit like that. All I’m thinking about is taking care of you.”

His claim made July realize something. Fletch was a man with needs. Who fulfilled those since he didn’t? Sadness washed over him. Just once in his life, he wanted someone who didn’t stray. He understood the score. Faithfulness wasn’t a real thing. But he wanted Fletch all to himself, and he was failing in the ways that mattered to masculine men.

Fletch’s brow furrowed. “What’s with the sad look?”

At Fletch’s question, July pasted on his brightest and fakest smile. “Nothing. Thank you for coming to the rescue… again.” Damn. Fletch really didn’t get anything out of this relationship.

Fletch shook his head. “We’re not doing this. You have my heart. There’s nothing you can’t say to me.”

July’s shoulders fell. Of course he would be good at communication. “It’s dumb. You definitely don’t want to hear it.”

“Don’t do that. That’s not us. We spent too many months fighting our way toward each other for a communication breakdown now.”

He was right. July had to be honest. “I just realized I’m not giving you what you need. That thought led to another, and then to another. I hurt my own feelings by wishing you were only mine.”

Baffled wasn’t enough to describe the confusion written on Fletch’s face. “What do you mean? I am only yours.”

July tried wiping away his comments. “Don’t worry about it. I don’t want to put you in the position of either having to lie or hurt my feelings worse.”

“Okay,” Fletch dragged out the word. “I need you to spill it right now.”

Why had July let Fletch convince him to say anything at all? “It’s fine. I just haven’t been meeting your needs, and I know that means you’ll go to someone for that. Maybe even if I’m doing those things, you’ll still go to someone else. Damn. Why did you make me talk about this? I don’t want you to be angry with me.” That led to a little more panic. July thought he might hyperventilate. He hadn’t healed from the last time he misbehaved. “Oh, no. Please, please forget this conversation. I can be better.” He couldn’t take more pain right now. “I swear I’ll be good.”

Fletch leapt into action.

One second, July couldn’t see from the pain in his head and the lack of oxygen; the next, Fletch’s lips were pressed to July’s forehead. He made soothing shushing sounds. As July’s mind cleared, he realized he was on Fletch’s lap being rocked.

“It’s okay. You’re safe. No one will ever hurt you again. You’re a good boy. There’s no one better. Just breathe.”

Well, fuck. He had fallen apart again. Surely one of these days, that would stop. PTSD was a hell of a thing. July didn’t know how to escape it.

Fletch had walked into this relationship with his eyes wide open. That didn’t mean this wasn’t killing him. He was hurt and enraged. If Rex wasn’t already dead somewhere, Fletch would find him and kill him. He needed to feel the life leave Rex beneath his hands. Fletch did his best to comfort July. His mind raced through every word July had said. Through the babbling meltdown, Fletch gathered July had already accepted Fletch would cheat because nothing sexual had happened between them. Then he obviously expected Fletch would hurt him for being upset at the idea that Fletch would cheat. While Fletch didn’t understand, nor did he want to know how July came to the conclusion, he fully comprehended why July expected that was how their relationship would be. It seemed July’s every relationship had been manipulative. Fletch had no doubt those mind games included acts that weren’t always consensual. Fuck. He hated everything about how July had been treated. All Fletch saw when he looked at July was a gorgeous, kind, fun, and brave man.

As quickly as the meltdown happened, July went completely still. His every muscle relaxed so quickly that Fletch panicked, thinking he had passed out. Fletch was almost more shocked to realize July looked as if nothing had happened.

July cleared his throat. “I’m sorry. I’m okay now.”

Fletch’s throat tightened. July had vanished behind a calm mask and dead eyes. Fletch realized he stared at the version of July that survived every horror. July was gone. This was a fake veneer. It hit Fletch. He had seen more of this side of July than any other. It was the peeks behind the mask that had captured Fletch. Fletch saw the truth now. July had been just surviving more than anyone realized. The guy who had stolen Fletch’s heart was still in there, and Fletch wanted him back. Whatever he had to do, July would never pretend peace and happiness again.

Fletch stood, set July on the bed, and then straddled him. He kept his weight on his heels so he didn’t hurt July, but July couldn’t get away.

“Okay. Let’s set the ground rules of us. Rule one: I will never touch anyone else. I haven’t wanted anyone else since we met. You have my focus. To be real, as much as I love sex, it’s not that important to me. I’m not some sex-crazed guy who’s always looking to score. Your health, feelings, and well-being are way more important than getting off. Sex isn’t good without the heart connection. You may as well jack off if you’re just fucking to be fucking.” Fletch held eye contact throughout his entire speech. He wanted to see July’s acceptance. “Rule two, or rule one, subsection one. I fully expect the same faithfulness from you. While there’s nothing I can do to stop you if you want someone else, I’d really appreciate it if you’d just break things off first. I’m an adult. If you’re done with me, you can say that. Which leads me to whatever rule we’re on now. I swear I’ll never hurt you. Not physically or mentally.” Fletch couldn’t resist running his fingertips along the curve of July’s jaw. “I know you’ve got to be terrified of handing me that trust, but it’s true. I would rather walk into traffic than see another bruise on your skin or tear in your eye. You’re under my care. I will always put you first.”

The way July stared at him was a caress to his soul. Even if July didn’t fully believe Fletch’s promises, the hope in his eyes was undeniable. Fletch would make damn sure his every dream came true. Starting now.

“Okay, baby. You’ve had the meds. Let’s get you ready to relax in bed for the rest of the day.” He stripped July with care, doing his best to be easy on his still-healing body. Fletch didn’t know how July had made it this long without a breakdown from the pain. The moment he had been handed the responsibility of taking the pain meds Austen prescribed, July had promptly stopped unless Fletch forced the issue.

Fletch found a one-piece pajama outfit that zipped up the front. It was hot pink with lipstick kisses. Since it didn’t have the attached footsies, Fletch also grabbed a pair of fuzzy pink socks. July hadn’t moved while he had been hunting. Fletch went hard the moment he set eyes on him again. Even battered, July was perfect in every way to him. He wore nothing but brief-style princess panties. The trust in his eyes and the way he waited patiently for Fletch was one hell of a turn-on. Fletch ached to be inside July. It had been too long since he had slept with anyone. Fletch wasn’t one of those guys who went home with anyone willing. He was too much into power play. Fletch scared people with his intensity. He didn’t know why he was this way. Fletch didn’t look too closely at things. No doubt he would find a bunch of therapy talk like him needing the control he never had as a child or a need to care for someone weaker the way no one ever cared for him. Blah, blah, blah. Fletch was good with himself.

“Do you want the panties off or on?”

“On, please. They’re really comfy.”

Fletch nodded as he gently dressed July. As he zipped the pajamas, a knock sounded. Fletch bit back a growl. “Hold on.” He put July’s socks on. “You can come in.”

At his shout, Tuff strolled inside. “You two have been summoned to Beau’s office. He sent me to watch your back.”

Fletch didn’t know which claim confused him more. He couldn’t think of a single reason Beau would need them. Fletch sure as hell didn’t get why Tuff had to watch their back in their home.