Page 39 of These Endless Nights

Or maybe I was just a complete fool and deep in shock.

Either way, I nodded, my eyes never leaving his.

His fingers were feather-light when he touched me, skimming over the bruising so gently I barely felt it. Even the fury I saw in him didn't scare me, knowing it wasn't aimed at me, but rather at the man who'd laid his hands on me.

For a moment, Typhon's hand fully covered the bruises, and it seemed to settle something within him. The beast he'd mentioned, maybe? I let him stay like that as long as he needed, but he didn't linger long, his hand falling away to rest on mine again, like he couldn't bring himself to stop touching me entirely.

I skimmed over my panic attack, framing it more like I'd just been scared for a minute. He didn't buy it, that much was obvious, but he didn't press me on it, which I was grateful for. I desperately did not want to relive those flashbacks.

"The others seemed to know something about what was happening, but I didn't ask." I stared down at our hands, guilt choking me. "I got so wrapped up in my own head that I didn't ask, and they obviously know more than I do."

Pathetic.

I'm so pathetic.

We sat in silence for a moment; me lost in my own self-castigation and Typhon… I couldn't even begin to guess. I had a thousand and one questions I should be asking right now, but a choking cloud of dull apathy numbed my curiosity, just like before in the bookstore. My system was completely overwhelmed, and my super helpful response to it was to just shut down.

At least if Typhon was disgusted with my weakness, I couldn't see it. I kept my eyes firmly on my knee, where his hand still rested on mine. His fingers twitched every few seconds, a tiny muscle spasm, as if his body was still trying to adjust. My hand nearly disappeared beneath his. It should have scared me, but instead, this was the closest I'd felt to safe in a very long time.

There wasn't much left to tell, and while I'd promised Lain that I'd talk to Typhon about maybe telling someone else, I didn't have it in me to have this conversation right now. I just wanted to crawl into my bed, pull the covers over my head, and pretend none of this had happened. Unfortunately, that wasn't an option. Not yet, anyway.

"Are you okay?" I risked a glance up at Typhon, only to find him staring at me, those glowing eyes locked on my face.

He tilted his head, and I realized he seemed a little more focused. The dangerous, feral fury I'd seen earlier had faded somewhat. It hadn't disappeared, still very much lurking in his gaze, but his more human side seemed to have asserted some control.

I nodded toward his injured arm, which still hung at his side. "When you did… whatever you did that made you like this. Did you hurt yourself? Should we check your injuries?" His wings were gone, so that was one less injury to worry about, but he'd still been shot four times.

Typhon glanced down at his injured arm, then over to his hip. The way he was kneeling beside me had to be bad for the wounds, and he couldn't hide his pain from me, but he just shook his head.

"I'll heal." The words came a little easier this time, but he still seemed to struggle. How long had it been since he'd spoken to anyone?

"I know I should ask you how you did this and what's going on and if you know anything about those men, but honestly… I'm so tired right now." Even to my own ears I sounded weak, pitiful.

One bad day and you're right back to where you were before.

Typhon studied me, then nodded once and carefully got to his feet. He favored his left leg, the one with two stitched-up bullet holes, and as he moved, his face pinched with pain, but still he made no sound. Why couldn't I be as tough as him? I'd barely been hurt and I'd fallen apart. I was still actively falling apart right this moment, otherwise I might have cared more that this position put me eye-level with intimate portions of his anatomy.

Using his gentle hold on my hand, Typhon urged me to stand, and I let him guide me to my feet. The back door was only a few feet away, but when he tried to open it, it didn't budge.

"It's locked," I groaned. At least I had my keys. I dug them out of my pocket with my free hand, needing three tries to actually use them to unlock the door before I managed it.

Typhon started to lead me inside, but Romulus growled from his spot by the door. He'd followed the command I'd given him earlier, but he'd never taken his eyes off Typhon the entire time we'd been on the deck.

"Rom. Safe."

That seemed to startle my dog. I'd had to teach him that after he kept growling at Lain whenever he came over. Several hours of internet research and weeks of trial and error finally resulted in him learning that whoever was with me when I said it was allowed to be here.

I'd only ever used it on Lain before.

Rom still seemed suspicious, but he stopped growling and allowed Typhon to help me inside. Without the wings and tail, he was finally small enough to pass through the door and into my tiny cabin without risking destruction.

The four kittens peeled around the corner at top speed, drawn by the sound of the door opening. So much for my latest attempt at keeping them in one room. I didn't even have time to be concerned about his reaction before they swarmed Typhon. Athos and Aramis held back, sniffing the air around him, but Porthos and D'Artagnan immediately started rubbing against his ankles. If he'd had pants on, they'd be trying to climb him.

Typhon glanced down at them, but his attention remained on me. He paused in the kitchen, looking to me for direction. I had a dozen things I needed to do, a hundred things we needed to talk about, but I was crashing hard and I knew I needed to lie down before I fell down.

Without a word, I led the way from the kitchen, down the short hallway to my bedroom. My bed was still rumpled from this morning, but the heavy blackout curtains on the windows meant it was cool and dark in here, which I needed. Pausing only long enough to toe off my shoes, I stumbled to the bed. It didn't sink in that Typhon was still holding my hand until I collapsed on it, though.

Crap.