Page 79 of False Comeback

His eyes darted to me again as he reluctantly started walking forward. I shifted my legs—only slightly—so he could get between them and the coffee table, and I refused to react when his knee brushed against mine.

He was wearing sweatpants and an old T-shirt, like usual. He sat down at the other end of the loveseat, leaving as much space between us as possible, and crossed his arms, slouching low like a petulant child who didn’t want to be here. His right knee started to bounce a little.

He almost looked nervous.

“Isn’t this the room Frank and Beans brought Dan’s head to when they stole it?” he asked with a frown. “Doesn’t seem all that appropriate, Corey.”

The orc’s smile grew a touch stiff but didn’t waver. “It was the only viable space where we could have complete privacy,” he said pleasantly, smoothing down his trousers. After a pause, he added, “And the furniture is borrowed from Taylor’s office, so I didn’t have to carry it far.”

Vince huffed and rolled his eyes.

“Do you have a problem with the space I’ve chosen for our session, Vince?” Corey asked in a clipped, pointed tone, adding a curt, “Darling,” at the end that made my mouth twitch.

“No, I’m just saying,” Vince muttered, staring at the armrest so his face was tilted away from me.

“Good.” Corey opened his notebook and picked up the pen tucked between the pages. “We will purge that lingering negative ambience in the room and fill it with the joyful energy of new friendship.”

Vince snorted quietly as my mouth twitched again, before I smoothed out my face and lifted my chin.

“Now,” Corey said in a soothing voice, “let’s begin—”

“I have one more question.” Vince interrupted him, which made Corey briefly close his eyes before he fixed the calming smile back on his face and gave Vince a patient look.

“Yes, Vince?”

“Are you actually qualified to do this?” he asked doubtfully. “Like, counsel us? Therapise us? Whatever the word is.”

Corey’s nostrils flared. “Yes. Of course I am.”

“Really?” Vince sounded unconvinced as his brow lifted.

With an elegant wave of his hand, Corey gestured at a framed certificate hung on the wall behind him—the only thing adorning the blank space. Vince leaned forward to squint at it as I eyed it dubiously. It looked like a sheet of A4 paper that had something printed on it. Possibly a certificate of some kind embedded in a confirmation email. The ink was a little faded, as if it had been running out.

“I am a graduate of Dr. Otticker Sexlie Richard-Regina’s online couples therapy school,” Corey said loftily. “Specialising in sex and relationship counselling, but many of the methods will apply here. It was a gruelling, intense two-week course.”

Vince and I stared at him in silence.

Corey gave us a winsome smile and sat back, poising the pen over his notebook.

“Now, let’s begin.”

Chapter Twenty-Six

Vince and Crossbody’s First Therapy Session

Crossbody

Vince and I sat in stiff silence at either end of the couch as Corey jotted something in his notebook, adjusted his useless glasses and looked up with another demure smile.

“I was thinking we could start at the beginning,” he said in that overly soothing tone. “Go back and recall your very first meeting. Crossbody, you’d been with us for a year when Vince joined the team. What do you both remember about the first time you spoke?”

“What?” Vince said in disbelief. “That was, like, five years ago. How are we supposed to remember that?”

“I certainly can’t,” I drawled, which was a lie. I did remember the first time I’d seen Vince, the day he’d walked into the backstage area and Holt had introduced him to everyone.

I remembered thinking nothing of note at first. He’d just been a stranger, an unfamiliar ghoul wearing ripped jeans and a faded T-shirt. As he’d confidently introduced himself to everyone, I’d approached with a polite smile and held out my hand.

“High Lord Crossbody,” I’d told him. “Royal fae. Pleasure to meet you.”