Page 49 of Louisiana Protector

He sighed and raked a hand through his hair in frustration. “I know you love me, Mimi. I know you’re in love with me.”

Her features softened as she held his gaze. “You’re right Johnny, I’m wildly in love with you. But right now, I’m working on trusting you again.”

“Mimi, I’m so damned sorry for the pain I caused you before. If I could undo it, I would. I would do anything to take away what I did to you,” he said earnestly. “What will it take for you to trust me again,” he asked. “I’ve told you… I’ve promised you over and over again that I will never abandon you again. I’ve promised you I’ll only be taking jobs here in Black Bog. How do I make you believe it?”

She hesitated for a long moment, her eyes dark and unfathomable. “I honestly don’t know,” she finally replied and then released a heavy sigh.

A deep frustration welled up once again in Johnny. He gazed at her for a long moment and then raked a hand through his hair. “Mimi, take a leap of faith with me.”

“I’m not ready to do that,” she replied. “Johnny, I feel like my life is so unsettled right now. I’m not going to work, so I’m out of my normal routine, and I’m frightened all the time about what might be coming next.”

He took her hand in his, hating the dark fear that stole the sparkle from her eyes. “I’m sorry this all has happened to you and I hate that you’re afraid, but I would give my life to keep you and Danny safe from harm.”

She squeezed his hand and then released it. “I appreciate that, Johnny.”

He blew out a deep sigh and stood. He wasn’t going to get a different answer out of her tonight. “I guess it’s time for me to head home.”

She got up as well, and together they walked to the front door. He turned and gazed at her. She was his very heart and soul, but the fact that she didn’t trust him would keep her from committing fully to him.

“Am I Danny’s father?” he asked softly. Surely it was time she told him the truth where Danny was concerned. She had to see how much he loved the boy.

“I’ve already answered that.” Her cheeks filled with color. “Johnny, don’t push me. We’ll see how things play out over the next few weeks.”

“Then I’ll just see you tomorrow night,” he said, once again disappointed by her response. “Good night, Mimi.”

“Good night, Johnny. Stay safe walking to your car,” she said.

Minutes later he was in his car and headed home. Depression weighed heavily on his shoulders. She hadn’t even trusted him enough to confirm that he was Danny’s father.

At least she would be safe from another attack by staying home from work and not being out alone. Right now, that was one thing he didn’t have to worry about, but he hated that she apparently was.

He thought of the three suspects. In the last week he’d seen River and Jean-Luc. However, he hadn’t seen Gus at all. Was Gus the guilty party? Was he out there planning to somehow get to her? Or was it River or Jean-Luc?

Dammit he wished he knew the answer.

Funny that it was easier to think about the criminals than it was to think about the fact that Mimi still couldn’t…wouldn’t commit to him.

THE MINUTE JOHNNY left the shanty, depression settled over Mimi. She checked in on Danny and then went to her room and got ready for bed.

How long would Johnny be willing to stay with the status quo? And what would it take for her to fully trust that he wouldn’t ever abandon her again? She wished she knew the answer.

It was possible he would grow tired of waiting for her, that he would decide she wasn’t worth it, and he would just move on. Her heart squeezed tight at the very thought. She didn’t want to lose him, but she just wasn’t ready to forget the past and marry him.

She finally fell asleep and into disturbing dreams of Johnny and hooded men.

She awakened the next morning feeling sluggish and tired. She dressed in a pair of jeans and a bright yellow T-shirt, hoping the cheerful color would make her feel better. She brushed her teeth and hair and then followed the scent of freshly brewed coffee to the kitchen.

Gramps sat at the table and offered her a cheerful good morning.

“Good morning to you,” she replied with far less enthusiasm. She walked over to the cabinet and pulled out her coffee mug, filled it with coffee and then joined Gramps at the table. “I was plagued with nightmares all night long, and I feel like I could use about five more hours of sleep,” she said.

“Then go back to bed,” Gramps replied. “You know I’ll take care of Danny when he wakes up while you get some more sleep.”

“Thanks, Gramps. But I’m already up and dressed, so I’ll just stay up.”

“Do you want to talk about your nightmares?” Gramps asked sympathetically.

“It was the same ones I’ve been having about hooded men chasing me through the swamp,” she said.