Page 67 of Darkened Promises

“I agree, and this isn’t a quick process. But I think we should end the session there. I’m not going to suggest anything to work on as this may have opened up a lot of thoughts for you, however if you need to meet earlier or need to reach out before our session next week, please do,” Linda presses firmly, her brown eyes trying to catch mine.

“Okay, thank you.” I nod.

My finger itches to end the connection. But I don’t. I don’t want to come across as too eager or rude, and I wait for her to do it. As soon as I’m alone, I collapse onto the bed, no longer having the energy to hold myself upright.

Surviving is exhausting.

I’m not sure how long I lie there, my mind drifting from no particular thought to the next, when the door opens. My vision blurs, and I fall back into my surroundings, noting that at some point Moshi curled himself against my chest.

“Little tease, you didn’t reply or call me back.” Nate’s tone is low, his usual level of scolding dialled back as he crouches next to the bed.

His fingers push back my hair, and the warmth of them sinks into my skin.

“I didn’t realise. I’m sorry,” I croak. My voice sounds rough.

Nate immediately helps me sit up, then reaches for the glass of water, still full from when Bry gave it to me earlier.

“I had the therapy session, then I zoned out for a while. It wasn’t on purpose,” I rush to explain once I’ve taken a sip.

“Was it too much? We can cancel if she pushed you,” he growls, his body tightening.

“I…think I need to keep seeing her,” I mumble, and my shoulders slouch under the heavy weight. “I don’t think it’s supposed to be easy. If I quit, then it’s like I’m failing you all.”

He closes the distance like it’s nothing, and his hands frame my face, lifting my gaze to meet his. The unwavering care in them feels good and safe. Perhaps too safe. That’s what Nate’s come to represent.

“No.”

“What?” I frown. Did he say other words and I missed them, or is he speaking in a code I don’t know anything about?

“You’d never fail me. So no, I’m not entertaining this conversation.”

I roll my eyes and huff. “Has anybody told you that you’re stubborn?”

“Yes, but I disagreed.”

“I’m not sure that’s going to sway anyone.” I try to hold in my snigger, but it escapes as a loud snort.

Nate smirks, and my fingers gravitate towards him. I trace his mouth, the need to touch too strong to ignore. “How was going back to work?”

“Shit. Hated not being here with you,” he declares.

My fingers move with the words as they still linger on his lips. For someone who appears to have so many hard edges, they’re surprisingly soft to touch.

With a smile, I lean in. “I missed you too,” I say, then close the distance for a tender kiss.

“Then I’ll stay home tomorrow, so we’re both happier,” he mumbles against me.

I should argue and tell him no, say that it’s healthier for us both if he goes. But I don’t because I’m struggling to maintain the strength to hold myself up, and Nate’s much better at doing it than I am.

Even if my reliance on him and the others isn’t a healthy habit to have.

THIRTY-FIVE

ROSY

Darkness coats me, thick and cloying. The scent that surrounds me is…metallic. My mouth opens, trying to avoid breathing through my nose, but I can taste it in the air. I choke.

I need to get out of here.