It all made sense now.
“Lucy?” Jeremy’s voice carried up the stairs. “You here?”
I scrambled to my feet, shoving the tests into their boxes and the boxes into my suitcase. I splashed cold water on my face and tried to make myself look normal. “Up here! Be down in a minute!”
I couldn’t tell him. Not yet. I needed time to process this myself before I could even begin to figure out how to tell him. What to tell him. Of course I had to tell him. He deserved to know. This was his baby too.
But not tonight. Tonight I just needed him. I needed to feel his arms around me. I needed to pretend, just for a little while longer, that everything was normal.
Jeremy was in the kitchen, still in his coat, pulling something out of a bag. He looked up when I appeared.
“Hey,” he said. “How are you feeling? Did you find what you needed?”
“Yeah.” I crossed the room to him, not stopping until I was pressed against his chest. “I’m okay.”
His arms came around me immediately, pulling me close. He smelled like pine and fresh air. I buried my face in his jacket and let myself breathe.
“I missed you today,” he murmured.
“I missed you too.”
He dropped a kiss on top of my head. Suddenly, I needed more.
I pushed up onto my toes and kissed him like I would suffocate without his very breath. His mouth opened, maybe out of shock, but he quickly got with the program. My tongue plunged into his mouth. I felt ravenous. I wanted all of it. I wanted to stop thinking.
“Lucy,” he said against my mouth, half laugh, half question.
“Don’t talk.” I dragged his coat off his shoulders and let it hit the floor.
Something in my voice must have landed because the smile left his face. He looked at me and whatever he saw there made him nod. I got his sweater up and over his head, nearly taking an ear with it. Then my hands were on bare skin. I pressed my mouth to his chest, his collarbone, and that delicious spot where his pulse kicked hard under my tongue. He made a sound that went straight through me.
“Jesus,” he muttered. “You’re shaking.”
I flicked open the button on his jeans and yanked the zipper down. “I need you.”
I shoved his jeans and boxers down his hips and dropped to my knees on the cold tile. I looked up at him, already wrapping my hand around him. He was half-hard from the kiss and thickening fast under my fingers. I licked my lips while he stared down at me with obvious shock. He braced one hand on the counter.
I lapped at him like I was taking the first lick of an ice cream. I groaned at the taste of him. I ran my tongue from base to tip and he grunted. I did it again, flatter, wetter, and closed my mouth over the head.
I moaned like I had just tasted the best thing ever. I took him deeper, hollowing my cheeks with one hand working the length I couldn’t fit. He was too big. His fingers found my hair. He didn’t push. He just held on for dear life.
“Fuck,” he breathed. “God, Lucy.”
The way his voice broke made me wet. I swirled my tongue and sucked. When I glanced up, his head had tipped back. His mouth was open. Every time I took him as far as I could, a rough sound tore out of him and went straight between my legs. He thickened against my lips. His hips twitched like he was fighting not to thrust.
“Baby.” His voice was ragged. His hand tightened in my hair. “I’m close.”
I hummed around him and didn’t pull away.
He reached down and pushed me off him. And then he yanked me up to my feet. His movements were jerky as he pushed my pants down. Hallelujah for elastic waistbands. I was naked in under ten seconds. He lifted me up and dropped me on the counter, the stone cold against my bare ass.
“What’s gotten into you?” he asked, pulling a condom from the wallet in his pants pocket on the floor. I almost laughed at the use of a condom.
“I’m going to lose my mind if you don’t fuck me right now.”
That did it.
“God, look at you,” he said in a husky voice. “Come here.”