“Just breathe,” Lucy said.
“Hospital bag,” I said. “I need my phone. I made a list. Where’s the bag?”
“By the front door. Where it’s been for the past three weeks.”
“Right. Yes. I knew that.”
I flipped on the lights. Lucy blinked against the bright lights.
“Okay. Bag. Car keys. You. Hospital. In that order.”
I walked to help her stand.
“Ow, ow, ow,” she groaned and dug her nails into my arm.
“Now you breathe,” I said. “Are we in the hooey phase or panting?”
I’d paid attention in class. I was very proud of how much I had researched. I had nightmares of being caught without a car, phone, and basically back in that cabin in Alaska and I would have to deliver the baby. I could do it.
But I didn’t want to. Fuck that.
“How far apart are they?” I asked, trying to remember literally anything useful.
“About seven minutes. We have time.”
“Seven minutes. Okay. That’s good. That’s plenty of time.” I grabbed the Ugg slippers that were comfy and suitable for walking outside. “Can you walk? Should I carry you? I can carry you.”
“I can walk.” She let me put her slippers on while she kept one hand on her belly.
I walked her downstairs, praying another contraction didn’t strike while she was on the stairs. I had tried to convince her to sleep downstairs, but she wasn’t having it. Another nightmare scenario was her, in her very unbalanced state, falling down the stairs.
We made it to the door. I grabbed the bag packed with all the essentials. My keys and wallet were right where they were supposed to be.
I opened the door but Lucy didn’t move. “Contraction?” I asked. “Already? It’s been a minute. Two tops.”
Visions of me delivering our baby in the living room flashed through my mind.
“Jeremy.”
“Yes?”
“I love you and your sexy, beautiful body, but I’d prefer that only I got to see you in all your glory.”
I nodded. “Baby, of course. Only you.”
“Then I’m going to need you to put some clothes on.”
“What?”
I looked down. Barefoot. Boxer briefs and nothing else.
I met her gaze and saw her fighting a smile.
“Shit. Don’t move. Thirty seconds. Do. Not. Move.”
“I have no intention of walking to the hospital.”
I raced upstairs, pulled on the clothes I had left out for this moment, and slipped on the shoes that didn’t require me to tie them. I grabbed both our phones and basically jumped from the top step to the bottom landing. Lucy still stood by the door.