Page 24 of Almost Not Quite Engaged

G-

I can’t do any more facon and ferns. I’ve been beaten by weeds, forced to hike in 100 degree heat. And I got a better offer.

I promise I’m not going to end up in someone’s trunk. Tell you about it later.

See, I’m fixed.

I left my dirt water in case you get thirsty and want the experience of licking the bottom of a boot!

Love you, call you from the beach

-Kat

PS And it’s time I get a haircut- I promise not to get bangs.

I run to meet my most unlikely source of salvation. He’s dressed like he’s headed to a Cape Cod porch mixer.

He spots me on the lawn, bags in hand, and exhales a sigh of relief. He had no need to be nervous. I’m following my totem, something I learned here at mystical camp. Follow your path, your spiritual guide, your signposts, your vision quest animus even if it doesn’t make sense. I learned that, and my liver needs more coddling.

I get in and the car pulls away as he hands me a Snickers and I greedily take a bite.

“Regrets?” I ask as preservative chocolate crumbs dance down the front of my shirt and I wipe them to the floor. My body instantly settling back into homeostasis.

“I’ll give you three reasons why I have no regrets, if you tell me three reasons why you got in a car with me. One, empirically you’re gorgeous.” Was not expecting that. I hold up a finger.

“Do not say you’re a pretty on the outside kinda girl.”

He nods, “Fair. Two, as fake fiancées go, you have a cutthroat quality, I’ll need for this mission. You’re relentless and ruthless.”

“Cryptic. Go on.”

“Three, despite my desire to loathe everything about you, I keep coming back to you’re funny.”

I don’t hesitate. “Red wine, red meat, and Red Bull.”

He laughs and turns back to his phone and rubs at the dust on his pants. I settle back, kicking off my shoes. “Don’t get too cozy.”

“Why? It’s like a four-hour drive to Salt Lake.”

This time he laughs at me, not with me. “You’re cute.”

“What happened to gorgeous?” We’ve only been driving ten minutes when we pull onto a helipad.

He grins. “It’s faster than driving.”

“This is the thing you should have told me. Nope. Not happening.” He gets out and walks around to open my door.

He reaches for me. “Trust me.”

“Never gonna happen.” A woman steps out of the helicopter and salutes us. “Her. I trust her. You, not so much.” I walk past him, hoisting myself into a helicopter completely convinced this is how I’m going to die and this is the wrong decision but given that evidence, it must be the right one.

Chapter 10

Never Have I Ever

KAT

In The Air