Page 124 of Almost Not Quite Engaged

“No. Boston. I don’t know how long.”

She goes still against me. I can feel her processing it. In my head, I know what it costs both of us. The show, the schedule, whatever we’ve been building toward since the Seychelles. I watch her set all of it aside.

“Oh.” The smallest word. “We can deal with all of that in the coming days.”

“Thank you. I didn’t know how much I needed you here.”

She takes my hand and kisses it. I’m embarrassingly close to losing it again. She sees it and does the only thing that could actually help, she starts mocking our families.

“Did you see the dynamics in that room?”

I smile and let her take the wheel. “Everyone in their assigned roles.”

“Stacey won’t stop crying, and Nate seems a little drunk.”

“He’s very drunk. That’s his role.” I glance around the waiting room. “Your dad okay over there?”

“He’s fine. Rob does quiet well. He’ll find someone to talk to eventually and be everyone’s best friend by sunrise.”

I smirk. “Don’t you find it slightly terrifying our mothers are the same person?”

She shudders. “I’ve been trying not to look directly at it.”

Birdie emerges from Jack’s room and motions for me. “He’s awake. Wants to see...” She stops me at the door, finishing her sentence. “...both of you.”

Our lie bubbles up somewhere between my chest and my stomach, and I feel Kat’s hand tighten in mine. Time to act the good couple. Except we’re not acting anymore, and I don’t know what to do with that either.

Jack’s ashen but with that white toothy smile. Kat bends down and kisses him on his papery cheek and sits in the chair that must have been Birdie’s perch for the last seventeen hours. I cross my arms and stick my hands in my armpits, leaving my thumbs on my chest. It’s something I do when I’m protecting myself and I only know that because Kat pointed it out somewhere over the Atlantic.

“Hi, Dad.”

“Where were you?” His booming voice now just a series of grave gasps and razor-cut sighs. It throws me.

I tighten my grip on myself as I speak. “We were in Cairo. I love you.”

“I’m not allowed to die yet, according to your mother.”

“Good, because I’m not ready to take care of her yet.”

Kat laughs and Jack attempts to but winces instead. I uncross my arms and place my open hand at the base of his neck. The closest place to his heart without disturbing any stitches or tubes. He turns his head.

“Missy, you are taking care of him?”

“I am, Jack. I’m happy to see you.” Her eyes fill.

“No, no, none of that. Get some sleep. I’ll be here.”

“Dad, do you need anything?”

A worrisome pause before he answers. “Scotch.”

I feel something unknot in my chest. “18 or 21?”

“Let Katydid choose.”

She fights back the tears and answers him. “I will when you’re out of here. Hurry, I’m thirsty.”

Jack nods slightly and looks at me. “Take your beautiful gal to bed. Sleep, son. You look like me.” Kat laughs too loudly and inappropriately, and Jack seems lightened by it. He pulls his lips into a tight semi-circle of a weak smile.