Page 65 of Shadowface

“No. I’m going to work on my stuff while you read.”

I let out a sigh and start reading through the first few paragraphs, fully aware he’s watching me, even though he says he isn’t.

My eyes rise. “I don’t find you that scary, you know.”

“You will…”

My eyes crinkle. “I will, what?”

“Eventually, you will be scared of me. I have no control when I’m near you. There is a strong possibility that beating heart of yours would cease to exist if I were near you right now. Especially the way you just positioned yourself like that.”

My mouth gapes open.

“Now get to reading. That chapter shouldn’t take you more than twenty minutes. When you’re finished, we can chat through the concepts. And when we are done, you’re going to keep this camera on so I can watch you sleep.”

Goosebumps form on my arms as a tremble runs through me. And I am fully aware now of the full evil residing on the other side of that screen.

I roll onto my side and let him watch, taking my time to read every word, hyper-aware of his clicking. Eventually, I ignore him and start to absorb it all. Once I’m done, he’s still there as promised, and we talk through each concept, focusing on the basic psychological theory of operant conditioning.

“I don’t understand the difference,” I finally admit after ten minutes of trying to explain it back to him. “I mean, I get what you’re saying… I’m just not sure how it’s different, if that makes any sense.”

His level of patience is astounding, and I forget what he is and let him help me, like he said he wanted to.

“It’s simple. Why did you take off your clothes earlier?”

Why did I do that?

I swallow a lump in my throat. “Because I wanted your attention.”

“And it worked, didn’t it?”

“I suppose, yes.”

“Are you going to make me wait next time I ask?”

I blink, wondering what next time he’s referring to.

“I’ll do whatever you ask, when you ask.”

“And I will reinforce that behavior by praising you. Now, let’s think about this another way entirely. You were jealous when you saw a photo of another girl, weren’t you?”

My jaw ticks.

“Answer me, Summer.”

“Yes,” I admit.

“You realized you’re not the only pretty blonde on campus, and that my affections are easily replaced. You did that by observing and gaining a better understanding of me. So you took your clothes off without the expectation that I’d help you. You did that all on your own, with no force or reinforcement. That ah-ha moment you had was a cognitive leap forward, and you gained a deeper understanding of yourself.”

“I…I’m not following you.”

“You realized that you wanted my affections and missed them. You crave me watching you. You like to be looked at, Summer, so you took your clothes off for a total stranger. That is quite the insight about yourself and your understanding of how badly I wanted to see you like that.”

Everything clicks, the concepts and my understanding of it.

I bring my fingers to my lips, keeping my eyes on the textbook, realizing everything he’s saying makes total sense.

Perhaps my naughty behavior isn’t because of anything being inherently wrong with me. That I enjoy being looked at because it pleases others to look at me. A strange man just got me to strip down and give him a show. And it was more, so much more, than only wanting his help.