Page 49 of Crossing Fire

He was silent for a time, just watching his lieutenants prepare, and I thought he wouldn’t respond. And when he did I almost wished he hadn’t. “I never wanted any of this. I was maneuvered into it by you, if you’ll recall.”

“You were always going to end up here,” I defended. “I’ve known it since I set eyes on you. It was inevitable.”

“You’re so convincing I almost believe it myself. But it’s not true, you know. It was never what I wanted.” He said it all quietly but with absolute conviction.

It hit me like a devastating blow then.

He had said as much before. I’d never believed it. I’d convinced myself he was only saying it to soothe me, to assure me that he’d never leave me, that he couldn’t have this thing he wanted out of a sacrifice at the altar of our love. Because a king of druids could never have a non-druid mate. It was impossible.

But hearing him say that he did not want it now at the pinnacle of his power, I realized I’d convinced myself of a lie.

“I don’t understand,” I said, but even that was a bit of a lie. I was beginning to understand very well and breaking my own heart all over again in the process. “You’re the one that believes in destiny.”

“I don’t want this,” he waved at the mass of his people in the stands. “I never did. I don’t know how to tell you more clearly. This was not my destiny.”

I shook my head, blinking away useless tears. “I thought it was the only way. And now you’re trapped.” What had I done?

“As I’ve said, leave the politics to me,” he said scathingly. “Your track record isn’t exactly stellar where these things are concerned.”

I said, my heart aching with the utter hopelessness of it, “I’m so sorry. You can’t quit, and they’ll never accept me by your side. Can’t you see it?”

His jaw was hardened, his face unreadable, his eyes faraway, but still somehow clearly focused on something I couldn’t fathom. “I’ve always seen more than you give me credit for, Jillian. You’re the one that’s blind.”

I leaned into him, getting worked up in a hurry. “What don’t I see? Enlighten me.”

He turned to me, and that far-sighted, focused gaze of his bore into me. It was intense.

“As I’ve said, power was never the most important thing, not for me.”

I swallowed, bracing myself for what was coming.

“You know what is even if you won’t admit it.”

I shook my head, but I knew. He’d already made it clear, and now it felt like he was just twisting the knife.

“This was never my destiny. You are. All I’ve ever wanted is to walk through the ages with you. You can throw me away as many times as you want, Jillian, but I’ll never throw you away, and I’d never put my rank above our family. Especially not now.” His voice was raw, as though a protective layer had been stripped from it, his vulnerability bared.

The problem with Dom was what that exposed was not weakness but a core of steel. He was so steady in his convictions that even the softest part of them was indestructible.

It was as incredible to me as it had always been.

“But won’t you be in danger if they depose you? Your predecessor won’t let you live. You’re too strong. Any new Arch will see you as a ticking time bomb, a problem to be solved, and there’s only one solution. It’ll be Declan all over again. You won’t be challenged; they’ll just make it easy on themselves and assassinate you.”

“It won’t be the same situation as before. I’ve already solved that problem. And I won’t be deposed. I’ll abdicate and maneuver a peaceful shift of power.”

It was as if the whole world moved and reformed itself to his perception with a few words that would have made no sense coming out of anyone else. “How?”

“I’ve groomed a successor from the start. Someone I trust implicitly. It may take a few more years, but when they’re ready, when the people are ready, I’ll support the claim, and help to defend it. It won’t be an easy transition, but that won’t stop me.”

“Cam,” I guessed. He was a natural leader. A bit mean and overzealous but well respected and a true powerhouse. No sane druid would challenge him.

“No, he doesn’t have the temperament for it, though he will help to defend it, hopefully as consort if they ever come to their senses. It will be Sloan.”

I wasn’t expecting that at all, though I liked it. On paper you might overlook her. She was only half-druid and a woman, which was uncommon for the role though there were no explicit rules against that. But she had the temperament for it. She was cool-headed, clever, and just. A lot like Dom when he wasn’t dealing with me, which was a large reason why they’d always been the strongest of allies and friends. She would make radical changes, but they would all be improvements, I had no doubt.

“It won’t be easy,” I remarked, though I wasn’t discouraging the idea. They’d just have a fight on their hands to get it done.

“Nothing worth doing is ever easy. She’ll make Cam and I lieutenants, and anyone that wants to have a shot at her will have to go through both of us. That alone will prevent most of the bloodshed that’s usually involved in a power shift.”