Page 427 of Face Off

“I cared about you before. You were terrifying in a completely different way.”

“How was I terrifying?”

“You checked everyone’s expression before deciding which version of yourself entered the room.”

The laughter leaves me more slowly than it left him.

Briggs doesn’t soften the observation or turn it into an apology. He opens the bag wider between us and waits while I decide whether I want another chip.

I take one.

“If Bliss laughed, you laughed,” he continues. “If Aura looked pissed, you became angry. If your father was present, you transformed into whatever version of Charm was least likely to be criticized once you were alone with him. You weren’t fake. You were terrified of giving anybody the wrong woman.”

“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me?”

“You weren’t ready to hear it.”

“I shouldn’t have needed to ask.”

“Pointing at someone’s survival mechanism before they have another one doesn’t help them. It only makes them ashamed of surviving that way.”

The answer takes the argument out of me.

Briggs reaches into the bag and eats another chip without looking smug about being right, which may be the most impressive evidence of his education I have seen.

“You don’t do it as much now,” he says. “You still scan the room, but you aren’t asking permission anymore.”

“I’m reading people.”

“Exactly. You turned something that used to control you into information you can decide whether to use.”

I lean one hip against the table. “What am I reading right now?”

“The apartment.”

“I can see that.”

“You aren’t searching for evidence of another woman.”

My fingers tighten around the neck of my beer.

Briggs watches the reaction without exploiting it.

“You’re checking whether there is room for you,” he says.

I look toward the books, the sweatshirt, and Ryan’s bag occupying a chair. “Is there?”

“So much fucking room that it has been depressing to witness.”

The answer hits hard enough that I have to look away.

“Ryan built a life here,” Briggs continues. “He didn’t build one designed to keep you out. There’s a difference.”

“He didn’t know whether I would ever come.”

“He didn’t know whether he would ever let you.” Briggs lifts his beer. “That man keeps everything he loves in reach and every person capable of hurting him at knife-point distance. You managed to occupy both categories, which has been exhausting for everyone.”

“That was almost compassionate.”