Page 56 of Ravage

“Good?”

“It means you're paying attention.”

I moved her hand to her waist and stopped there, letting her decide whether to keep going. For a moment, she didn’t move. Then her fingers curled against the fabric of her shirt, and I saw the exact second she understood what I was asking of her.

Not obedience.

Not a show.

A choice. Her choice. She kept her eyes closed as she whispered, “Ravage…”

“You’re doing good, Em.” I eased my hand from hers and took a step back. “Now stop and just sit with it.”

“Sit with what?”

“Whatever you’re feeling. Right here. Right now.”

She did as I said, but it wasn’t easy.

She was struggling not to fidget, not to say something to fill the silence, and that was just the first part of the lesson. I stood, and she opened her eyes, tracking me as I moved closer. I was right in front of her, close enough that she’d only have to lean forward a few inches to close the gap between us.

I didn’t move. I wanted her to feel the choice sitting right there in the space between us. I knew she’d felt it when she whispered, “Ravage…”

“I’m right here.” My voice dropped. “I’m not going anywhere… I’m also not touching you unless you ask me to.”

She looked up at me, and I could see the war raging inside of her. I could see the longing in her eyes, the desire, the heat, the urge to grab my shirt and pull me close. I could also see the fear of wanting something so much. She wasn’t alone in those feelings, but tonight wasn’t about me.

This was about her.

“You can feel that, can’t you?” I asked, but I already knew the answer. “I’m not touching you, Em.”

“I hate you a little right now.”

“No, you don’t.” I gave her a moment. I let her sit in it and let the ache build instead of rushing to fix it for her. “You hate that you like it… That you want it.”

Her hands dropped to her sides, and she fisted the comforter, like she needed something to hold onto that wasn’t me. “Most people run straight past this part… Straight to the end, like the whole point is getting there. It’s not. The point is right here. You want something and don't get to have it… Not yet.”

“That’s a cruel thing to teach a person.”

“It’s the hardest, most honest thing I could teach you.”

I stayed exactly where I was. I was close enough to feel the warmth of her breath against my neck but far enough away that the only thing bridging the distance between us was her decision.

Not mine.

I forgot every damn rule I’d made for myself when I said, “When you’re ready to close the distance, you will.”

I couldn’t help myself. She was so damn beautiful, and not just in the obvious ways. God knows there were plenty of those, like how her green eyes seemed brighter when she was nervous or how her lips parted ever so slightly when she was trying to decide what to say. Hell, even the little crease between her brows when she was thinking too hard had me struggling.

But it wasn’t just her looks that had me so tangled up.

It was her, the woman beneath the smoking hot looks.

Emery was stronger than she gave herself credit for. She’d lost both her folks, but it hadn’t crippled her. Instead, she used it to help kids and hold her own in a clubhouse full of hardened bikers. She was open in a way most people weren’t. People like me. I admired that, along with the way she trusted people. The way she trusted me. That made me nervous, because she was lying here, letting me guide her through something she hadn’t experienced before, and she was trusting me not to push her beyond what she was ready for.

And while every selfish part of me liked the fact that she was looking at me like she wanted more, I didn’t push. I wanted to protect that trust she had in me. I didn’t just want her. I wanted her to feel safe with me, that she didn’t have to pretend with me, and that was making it a hell of a lot harder to keep my focus.

My voice was strained as I told her, “And when you do, I want you to know exactly what you’re choosing. Not what you fell into. Not what you were pushed into. But what you chose.”