Page 30 of Big Mistletoe

Finally, she looks at me, and I’m surprised by the sadness in her eyes. “What do you mean?”

I take a step toward her, but I don’t dare touch her. I don’t trust myself because every instinct I have is telling me to throw her over my shoulder and carry her to my house and never let her go. “Just like that, you leave?”

She looks back at the tree. “That was the plan. It was temporary until I found a new place.”

My whole body tenses. “That may have been your plan, but it wasn’t mine.”

Her hand stills. For the first time since I walked in, she looks at me for more than a second. She blows out a breath. “Nick, you know everything is going back to normal at the start of the new year.”

My forehead creases. “What?”

She shrugs. “This was temporary.” She gestures between us. “Me staying with you. Working from your office. All of it.”

I stare at her in shock. “No.”

She frowns and looks back at the tree. “I heard you talking to Rachel.”

I shake my head. “What are you talking about?”

I hear the emotion in her voice. “You said everything has to go back to normal in January. You said that it would all go back to the way it was.”

It takes me a second, but then I remember. Rachel and I were talking about the decorations and the holiday schedule. I want to laugh. It’s a misunderstanding, that’s all this is. I can fix this. “Joy.”

She shakes her head, takes a deep breath, and lets it out. “I don’t want to get hurt, Nick.”

Fuck, if she cries, I’m going to lose my shit. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

She stares at the ornament in her hands. “You don’t know that.”

I take a step toward her. “Yes, I do.”

She’s still not looking at me, but she shrugs. “How?”

I put a finger on her chin and lift so she’s looking at me. “Because I don’t want you to go.”

She tries to look away, but I move closer. “I don’t want you moving into that apartment.”

Her eyes flash. “You went there?”

I pop a shoulder. “Of course I went there.”

She shakes her head, confused. “How did you even know where it was?”

“I threatened your landlord until he told me.”

Her mouth drops open. “Oh my gosh.”

“I’m serious, Joy. You’re not staying there.”

She takes a deep breath. “It’s not your decision to make, Nick.”

Fuck. “I know.” I try to keep myself calm even though I’m feeling almost frantic. She can’t leave me. I can’t let her. “I know I don’t get to decide for you.”

She watches me carefully. I put my hands on her shoulders. “But I need you to understand something.” I take a deep breath. “I didn’t mean you when I said things were going back to the way they were.”

Her eyes search mine.

“I was talking about the decorations. Work. Everything being torn apart for the holidays.”