Page 122 of Wicked Villain

I allow the phone to ring out to voicemail.

I haven’t been taking any of my mother’s calls. She’s been trying to reach me since yesterday, but I just haven’t had the strength to speak to her.

She didn’t do anything wrong, but I can’t bring myself to talk to her. I sent a few texts letting her know I’d call back when I was ready, but I know she’ll keep trying.

I don’t want her pity, or her understanding. I don’t want her disappointment either. I just want to be left alone until I can steady my mind.

A small knock sounds at the door. I look up to see Zoya, standing there with some books in her hand.

She’s wearing a long pea-green coat and her silver hair is braided to the side.

The usual sternness I’m used to is nowhere to be seen. Instead, there’s a softer look in her expression.

“Hi, Zoya.”

“Hello, there. Didn’t want to startle you, so I thought I’d knock,” she says, walking over to me. “I got these for you.”

She sets the books on the table.

There are three of them. All art books.

“You got these for me?” I can’t hide my surprise.

“I did. I went to the market and saw them in the new book shop. This one reminded me of you most.” She points to the thicker book about dark gothic art.

I’m already excited to read it. And grateful for the gesture.

When I was doing my postcards, I noticed her quietly admiring my work. At the time I thought she was checking to make sure I really was into art. Because of our run-in the week before in Lev’s office. It seems though, that she was paying attention.

“I really appreciate this, thank you.”

“You are most welcome.”

“I’ll enjoy reading them. I’ve been devouring the art books in here.”

“I know.” She gives a small smile, the first I’ve gotten from her. “I’ll leave you to read, but I have a message from your mom.”

Instantly, I straighten. “She called?”

“Yes, just now. She wanted to know if you could stop by the house. She’d like to see you. She says she had something to discuss,” she explains. “It sounded important and … she sounded quite worried, dear.”

I sigh. Maybe I’m being unfair to Mama. I’ve never refused to speak to her before. She must be going insane with worry. With her condition, I don’t want to give her extra stress.

I suppose I could push aside my distress and see her. Papa isn’t around during the day, so I won’t run into him again. Honestly, I’d rather not see him again. How do you look someone in the eye when they’ve said such hurtful things to you?

“Okay.” I nod and pull in a deep breath. “I’ll get myself ready and head over there in a few minutes.” I’ll stay for an hour and be back by dinner time.

“Alright. I’ll see you later.”

“See you later.”

Zoya leaves and I stare at the books on the table.

I don’t want to go anywhere but maybe seeing Mama will help me too.

Mama is sitting in the garden under the gazebo.

The rain has stopped now, leaving behind the scent of grass and wet roses.