Page 80 of Playboy Pilot

Suddenly, it felt like I couldn’t breathe. The words just wouldn’t come out.

“Sorry. This is just not easy for me. I haven’t spoken about her with anyone. I’ve spent the past several months basically running, spending even less time at home than before because, even though she was only there with me a short time, it’s the place that now reminds me of her the most because it’s where we…” I hesitated, “Consummated our relationship.”

“Tell me about her,” she repeated.

“Her name was Kendall. Uh, is Kendall. I mean she’s not dead. She’s still out there somewhere.”

“How did you meet?”

“At the airport.”

“Not too unusual for a pilot, I suppose.”

“Yeah, but our story was anything but usual.”

The next twenty minutes was spent describing the weeks that Kendall and I fell in love. The words flowed freely until I came upon the hard part.

“So, she called you and said she was meeting you at the airport. It sounded good. You assumed that she was going to take you up on your offer to father her baby. You felt ready to be a father…”

I closed my eyes. “Yes. Yes, I did. With her…I did.”

“What happened that day?”

I continued my story, painfully recalling the last moments with Kendall inside the airport lounge before she revealed her run-in with Cass and walked out of my life for good.

Dr. Lemmon took off her glasses, seeming affected by my story. “That must have been a very difficult moment.”

“I still can’t wrap my head around it, how everything just crumbled so fast.”

“Do you blame her for leaving so abruptly?”

“No. No, I don’t. I might’ve done the same thing in her shoes.”

“What did you do after she left?”

“I stayed at the lounge in disbelief. It took me a couple of hours to work up the energy to go home. I had a friend pick me up, because I’d had a lot to drink, so I passed out on my bed and slept the entire night until it was time to wake up for my flight the next day.”

“How was that?”

“Just as Kendall had warned me, Cass showed up. She worked the flight and told me she needed to talk to me about something important once we landed. After we got to Brazil, she told me everything…that she was pregnant and carrying my baby.”

“What was your reaction?”

“I was despondent, too heartbroken to even think about the big picture. At that point, all I could think about was losing Kendall. Nothing else mattered. I told Cass I would help support the baby if it turned out to be mine, but that I wouldn’t be able to give her anything more. I made it clear I would insist on a blood test once the baby was born.”

“Was she okay with that?”

“She wasn’t happy with my lack of interest or excitement, but there was nothing I could do to change that. I didn’t want that life with her. All I cared about was Kendall and had no energy to deal with anything else.”

“What ever became of Kendall?”

“I wish I knew.”

She looked stunned. “You don’t know?”

“To this day, I don’t know. She said she planned to go along with the insemination, but whether she really followed through is a mystery.”

“Have you tried calling her?”